You are not alone!
Addiction to pornography is a real issue in the world, even amongst some Christians. So if you are one of those fighting the battle against this unwholesome habit, know that you are not alone in the struggle.
But do not lose sight of the fact there is a way out for you. I mean, do not give up on yourself, thinking you have lost the battle already.
No, you haven’t!
The good news is that you can be helped – just like some people have been helped and have overcome the addiction to pornography.
The rest of this post is a contribution from one of my readers. In response to my post On Billy Graham’s famed scandal-free life, the author openly shares his struggles with lust and pornography as well as the ways to gain victory over them.
And because I didn’t want the gems in the contribution to be buried away or lost all-together in the comment section of my blog where it was first posted, I have obtained the commenter’s permission to share the full text of the comment here so that many more of my readers can benefit from it.
I have inserted appropriate headings to make navigation of the article easier. I believe you will benefit from reading it.
Yes, pornography and lust have been my greatest of struggles. I wish I could say one day Jesus delivered me from those desires but to this day I have to remain on guard at all times.
For your readers I would start with how harmful pornography is, as many people think it is just a normal part of daily life, and countless Christians regularly view it…
Gaining the victory
Victory (which I am hesitant to call it) comes from three things.
First you have to HEAL the wounds of your past that drive you to watch pornography (or any other sin). This healing came to me through Celebrate Recovery, a Christ-centered 12 step Program.
What drives sinful behaviours?
Our sinful behaviour is driven by SOMETHING and often times the source lies in our past. When we can learn to truly heal those wounds, we can begin to be free of the bondage.
How do we heal those wounds?
[Realise that God has forgiven us and we should accept that forgiveness. We should also forgive ourselves and others who have offended us.
Recommended: 6 Simple Reasons to Forgive Offences]
Second, we have to set up defences in our daily lives and take this seriously.
The enemy is roaming about like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. The enemy wants to kill us and everything we have worked towards the kingdom of God… So we NEED defences.
What are the defences we need against pornography?
1) Accountability partners. We need to have a team (2-3) of trusted people of the same sex we can speak to about our most intimate sinful thoughts. People that won’t judge us and will support us by holding us accountable.
These people should be fellow Christians and it helps if they struggle in the same areas… or better yet have victory in your area of struggle. YOUR spouse should never be on this team… they are usually the victims of our stupid behaviour.
2) Accountability software. Personally I use Covenant Eyes, which sends a weekly report of all my computer and device activity to my accountability team. It’s only $15/month… but is invaluable. There are a bunch of others out there as well.
3) Identify your triggers and defend against them. TAKE Extreme measures if necessary, this is your marriage, your family, your ministry even your life that is on the line!!
For six months I pulled the TV off the wall, and read more books, because there were too many triggers on TV of sexual imagery and I could never predict when they would show up.
I quit ALL social media and still haven’t gone back to any of them. I gave up my smart phone for over a year and bought a flip-phone with no pornography access.
The last thing I will mention, not last in importance, but FIRST… is we need to spend quality time with GOD every day… not as a to-do-list or a good christian checklist. But because God wants a relationship with us, and how do we have a relationship with anyone we never spend time with?
It is Jesus Christ alone that will eventually demolish any strongholds of sin in our lives… but we have to do our part and turn away from our sinful desires.
I am always available for support and questions if any of your readers need help overcoming pornography or lust in their lives. We are in this together, we need to stand shoulder to shoulder on this battlefield.
Stay Strong & Stand Tall.
Thank you so much Keith for this awesome contribution.
Dear reader, please feel free to make your own contribution to the discourse via the comment section. And if you have any questions, Keith – “a Christian writer and Apologist who spends his time defending the faith, encouraging other Christian believers and serving in his local church” – has offered to provide answers.
Feel free to download his new ebook Shattering the chains of sexual addition. You may also visit his blog, Stand Tall For Christ, for more helpful resources.
©Copyright 2018 | Victor Uyanwanne
Wonderful post, Victor. This is such a problem, even within the church (as everybody knows). Let’s all band together in prayer to defeat this ugly part of our culture. And great response, too, Keith!
Thanks Shawn for reading and commenting. Special thanks to Keith for the comment that was turned into the post.
Thank you Victor for posting this. I reached out to Keith and am now following his blog. Pornography is a huge problem in the Church and what Keith is doing is great. Indebted to you brother! Grace and blessings!
I appreciate your comment Bruce. And thanks for reaching out to Keith and following his blog as well.
I know he would be glad to know that you discovered his blog through mine. Although i began following him recently myself, i have enjoyed the experience so far; I can see in him the genuine interest in helping people live for God. Once again thank you.
I saw the same thing Victor and thank you!
You are welcome Bruce. In the mouths of two witnesses the truth is confirmed.
Victor, thank you so much for all you do for the Glory of God.
1 Corinthians 15:58 says we should be… “always abounding in the work of the Lord” and I see you doing a mighty work in the name of Jesus.
I am so excited to have met such Kingdom workers as you, Shawn and Bruce… plus the many others… it is such a great time to be Kingdom Builders, when our small voices can literally reach around the world in an instant.
Stay Strong & Stand Tall Men of God.
Thank you Keith. Indeed it is our shared privilege to be able to “stand tall for Christ” in our world. Let us keep the light shining.
Thanks so much for the blog post, Victor; it was really encouraging because I do struggle with pornography and it has essentially become an addiction but I feel the root of the problem lies with my own inability to trust people (outside family, of course) and a need for friendship with fellow Christians.
Thanks for reading and commenting. Like it was observed in the post, you are not the only one struggling with that issue of pornography.
Keith found it helpful to avoid the pornography triggers and focus on the word of God. I believe you can too.
It is a good thing you have identified the root-cause of the problem and gladly, none of the two you mentioned are without solutions.
First, when we trust God, we can pray to Him and expect Him to send the people we can trust into our lives. To be honest, life is not so enjoyable without trusting people. Not everyone is a jerk!
Second, your need for friendship with fellow Christians is a valid need. But love must be the foundation. When you love people, you lay a solid foundation for genuine relationship or friendship.
I’m not saying you should be friends with all Christians but there are some you can have meaningful friendships with. Let the Spirit of God guide you.