5 Simple Ways to Honour Your Father on Fathers’ Day

It’s that time of the year when we celebrate our fathers – on Fathers’ Day, every third Sunday in the Month of June.

Why Fathers’ Day?

It is the day set aside to honour fathers around the world for their positive influences in our lives and their immense contribution to the society.

Despite the prevailing Covid 19 pandemic, we can still celebrate our Fathers. The lockdown should not make us forget them on Fathers’ Day.

We all have fathers or father-figures in our lives. Let’s do something special to honour them, appreciate them; show immense gratitude to them.

Talking about gratitude, we can begin with a heart of gratitude to our Heavenly Father, God. He alone deserves all praises, glory and adoration forever and ever.

And to our earthly fathers, this is the time to show them love, I mean special love. Let’s remember them in our prayers and also reach out to them with our material blessings.

Can you remember the countless times your daddy bought gifts for you when you were growing up? He bought gifts for you on your birthdays when you were celebrating and sometimes when you weren’t even celebrating anything.

Fathers are special but they have remained under-appreciated. They spend their lives protecting, providing and guiding us in life.

Even if you no longer have a living father, there must be someone in your life that you see as a father-figure. Reach out and honour him on this occasion of Fathers’ Day.

I wish I could list all the things you could do to honour your daddy on Fathers’ Day. But I believe you can thoughtfully come up with simple or creative ways to honour him.

If you are still stuck, let me give you a few more suggestions:

5 Simple ways to honour your Father and father-figures on Fathers’ Day

1. Call him on that day to wish him a happy Fathers’ Day.

This call is particularly necessary if you don’t live  in the same city with him any more, or if you can’t physically visit him as a result of the  restriction in movement in some places occasioned by the Covid 19 pandemic. Just call and tell your dad that he still means a lot to you.

2. Buy a special gift for him.

Think of something special your dad will appreciate as a gift and have it presented to him this time. Even if it’s something he can afford on his own, you will still be appreciated for the thoughtful act.

3. Prepare a special meal for him or if he likes eating out, you can give him a treat away from his dinner table.

Men like it when delicious meals are specially prepared for them. And your dad is not an exception. So treat him to a special meal this time around.

Does he have a favourite restaurant, he has been longing to go? If yes, end that longing and make it an real experience for him.

4. Visit him with your kids (his grand children).

I’m yet to see a dad who wouldn’t like his grandchildren to visit him. So to honour your father on this Fathers’ Day, you can take your children to visit their grand father. Lovely memories will be created from such visits.

5. Spend quality time with your dad.

When was the last time you were in your Father’s presence for at least two hours in a row? I know life is demanding and so you haven’t really had the time to be with your daddy. Now let this Fathers’ Day be a good excuse for you to spend time with your dad.


The point has already been made: it’s Fathers’ Day, so honour the fathers and father-figures in your life, with special honour.

Show them you love them. Make them feel special because they are!

On the occasion of this year’s Fathers’Day, do whatever is within your capacity to make your dad (or the father-figures in your life) feel special.


In what other ways can we honour fathers on Fathers’ Day? Let the conversation continue in the comment section.

“I Can’t Breathe” Hasn’t Always Had A Negative Expression

“I can’t breathe,” has now become the rallying chant for protests in major cities around the world against social injustices of diverse kinds.

Except you just landed from Mars, you would have heard, read, or seen the words “I can’t breathe” in the media over the past few weeks.

They were the last recorded words of George Floyd who died in May 2020 as a result of the brutality meted out on him on the streets of America by Derek Chauvin, an officer from the Minneapolis Police Department.

You know the story already, don’t you?

In case you missed it, let me rehash it a little.

George Floyd protests
Photo credit: Vox

George Floyd – I can’t breathe

A black man gets arrested by the Police for whatever offense. He is pushed to the ground, hands tied to his back and the back of his neck gruesomely pinned to the ground with the strong knees of one of the four duty Policemen.

The helpless man struggles to breathe on the floor beneath the knee firmly pegged to his neck. Fighting for his dear life he repeatedly said, “I can’t breathe” for as long as eight minutes but the policeman wouldn’t bulge.

In the end, the man was suffocated to death, becoming another victim of Police brutality in America.

But people say, this incident was more than just a police brutality issue. It was racism shamefully being displaced.

Don’t we understand why? Another black American man is hacked to death in the hands of a white police officer – just as it has happened countless times in the past.

The general consensus seems to be that the Floyd killing is another example of the systemic racism deeply ingrained in America’s law enforcement agencies, the Police in particular, who have variously been accused of having a pathological desire to mistreat (read, kill) its black population in the name of enforcing the law.

Source: Wikipedia.org

Eric Gardener – I can’t breathe

The Floyd incident was definitely not the first time the American Police has used lethal force to effect the arrest of African-American offenders. And it was also not the first time that “I can’t breathe” statement has been heard from the lips of someone being manhandled by the Police.

Remember the case of Eric Gardener? He was killed by the Police in 2014 in the process of getting him to submit to arrest.

He too had said, “I can’t breathe” before losing consciousness and eventually dying as a result of the suffocation caused by a policeman’s choke-hold around his neck (pictured above).

In many States around the US, people are now using the words “I Can’t Breathe” to protest the killing of George Floyd. There is a renewed focus on the issue of race relations and the need to stop racism and Police brutality.

Another perspective

Admittedly, in both cases of Gardener in 2014 and Floyd in 2020, “I can’t breathe,” were spoken in negative circumstances (of mistreatment). So it’s understandable when the expression is used in speaking against such social vices as racism, police brutality, inequality in the society, etc.

But do you know there are times the phrase “I can’t breathe” might not have a negative connotation? Stay with me as we name a few good circumstances where ‘I can’t breathe” might not have a negative meaning:

  • When you are momentarily in the presence of someone you love or idolise.
  • When you receive a gift that meets or surpasses your expectation.
  • When you travel to beautiful or exotic places or the first time.
  • When you receive a piece of cheerful news.
  • When you receive an offer that is beyond your imagination.
  • When you …(You can add to the list). I

I just want to point out that “I can’t breathe” doesn’t have to be a negative expression all the time. Is that not why we have the idiomatic expression, to”take one’s breath away” in the English language?

Let’s examine it more closely.

To ‘take ones breath away

When you breathe, you take in oxygen to fuel your body activity. So when you can’t breathe, your brain is deprived of vital oxygen which can be fatal if not corrected. So it’s a cause for concern if you say you can’t breathe (literarily speaking).

But the expression, to “take one’s breath away” has no such negative connotation. According to the dictionary it means to:

Astonish or shock one, with pleasure, surprise, or some other emotion. For example, That beautiful display just takes my breath away. This idiom alludes to the way one holds one’s breath when overcome with sudden emotion.

Courtney Timmons – I can’t breathe

Courtney Timmons on American Idol

Let me conclude this post with the story of 22 years old Courtney Timmons, a security guard from Harris Neck, Georgia, USA. She went for the American Idol filming only to learn that the auditions had ended.

Feeling disappointed, she hung out around the venue as a little consolation for missing out in an opportunity to showcase her singing talent.

However,  she found favour when an officer of the Show spotted her sitting on the street and pitied her. The officer brought Courtney in before the judges who obliged her to sing.

At the end of her short performance, the judges – which included popular American singer, songwriter, composer, multi-instrumentalist, Lionel Richie – gave her a standing ovation and a golden card invitation to Hollywood.

Based on this, Courtney was emotionally “astonished with pleasure” to the point that she had to say, “I can’t breathe…” to express her feeling of excitement and total satisfaction.

You can watch Courtney’s awe-inspiring YouTube video on the set of the American Idol show. And pay attention to see where she said “I can’t breathe…”

Thank you for reading and please let me know what you think.


On Premarital Sex And  Steve Harvey’s 90-Day Rule

As the Covid 19 lockdown continued to last, I found myself watching several short clips from the very popular Steve Harvey Show on Facebook. While I had many moments of inspiration and entertainment watching selected episodes of the show, I also had a few moments that I had to say, “No Steve, I beg to differ.”

Steve Harvey on the set of Steve Harvey Show.
Steve Harvey

Please don’t misunderstand me; I am not knocking Steve Harvey here; he is a well-loved celebrity comedian with huge fans across the globe.

I’m just saying that in as much as I like him and his inspiring show, there are areas where our individual beliefs do not align. Hang on, I will explain what I mean in a moment.

Steve Harvey is a funny man, everybody knows that. You could not watch him in his elements without being enthralled by his witty sense of humour. But let’s save that gist for another day and focus on the issue at hand.

During his TV shows, Steve gives out relationship advice to his teeming studio audience (and by extension to viewers at home), especially during the “Hey Steve” segment of the show.

That’s the segment where Steve entertains some questions from some members of the audience. He then provides answers in terms of a personal advice on how to deal with the issues being asked about.

A member of the audience on Steve Harvey Show asking a question

While, I would agree with many of his perspectives, there are clearly instances were I would disagree with him. For instance on the issue of sex while dating, I feel differently from how Mr. Harvey would advise his audience.

To the best of my knowledge, I believe that sex while dating, (premarital sex) is illicit sex. And such should not be encouraged, especially amongst Christians.

As a disciple of Jesus Christ, I stand with the Biblical position that encourages young people to wait till they are married before engaging in sexual activities.

However, going by what I heard on several episodes of the Steve Harvey Show that I watched, it would appear to me (correct me if I’m wrong) that Steve Harvey does not have any qualms with people having sex while dating (before they get married, whether or not marriage is in the picture).

Another reason I’m convinced that uncle Steve, as his teeming fans prefer to call him, supports premarital sex is the principle behind his 90-day rule of sex. Let’s talk about it here.

Steve Harvey’s 90-day rule

While Harvey is okay with you having sex with someone you are dating, what he seemed to advise (as a lady) is that you should not make it happen so early in the dating relationship. And that’s where the question of his so-called 90-day rule comes in.

Most often than not, many of the people who ask him questions about dating relationships would usually make reference to the “90-day rule,” which I learnt Harvey strongly espoused in his book, Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man.

Let me state upfront that I haven’t read the book (yet). However, one source claims that through that book, “Steve Harvey… has inspired women around the world to hold off on sex for 90 days upon entering a new relationship, in order to get the respect they deserve, and land a man who is truly all in.”

Sex while dating = Steve Harvey's 90-day rule.

“Often referring to sex as the “cookie”, Steve Harvey suggests that women keep the cookie in the cookie jar for a probationary period of 90 days, causing men to have to prove themselves, work for and earn the benefits.”

That sounds great or not? Your answer will depend on what you believe and where you are in your relationship with God. As for me, you must already know where I belong – if you have been reading along with me.

Before we proceed further, let’s go over the import of the 90 day rule again:

  • A girl in a dating relationship with a guy should not have sex with the guy for at least the first 90 days of their being together.
  • The reason for this is so that the guy will prove his commitment to the lady and earn sex as a reward.
  • The girl is thereafter free to offer sex to the guy once he has proven his commitment to the girl by waiting for the 90 days.

Some ladies around the world might have been applying this rule, but that does not mean it is one hundred percent right. Again, your sense of right or wrong is a function of your beliefs and relationship with God.

In my own opinion, this rule puts the burden of holding off sex for 90 days on women. But I think it is supposed to be a joint responsibility of the man and woman involved.

Secondly, the rule doesn’t prohibit premarital sex; it only says to delay it for the first 90 days of meeting a guy. After that, the lady is free to engage in sex with the guy, if he passes the waiting test.

But are believers in Christ supposed to follow this rule too? Frankly speaking, I do not think so. The simple reason is that God has called believers to a higher standard of sexual purity.

What the word of God teaches

1 Corinthians 6:18

Anyone who doesn’t have any qualms with sex before marriage may be okay with the Harvey’s 90-day rule. But anyone who believes that sex should wait till marriage will think differently. The latter will know that the issue at hand is not a question of how long or short you have to hold off sex while dating but a question of an event (marriage) having taken place before doing the do.

Anyone who sees himself or herself as a true follower of Jesus Christ should belong to the latter category. A true believer in Christ should not support or practice sex before marriage or sex outside marriage.

In his letter to the Corrinthians, Apostle Paul gives the following advice:

Run away from sexual immorality [in any form, whether thought or behavior, whether visual or written]. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the one who is sexually immoral sins against his own body.
1 Corinthians 6:18 AMP

Bible scholars tell us that “the word translated as “sexual immorality” or “fornication,” is the Greek word porneia, which means “illicit sexual intercourse.”

It is clear from the above that God doesn’t want us to court sexual immorality. And premarital sex is sexual immorality, which is an illicit sexual intercourse. And in the context of this discourse, “run away from sexual immorality” could be read as, “run away from premarital sex.”

Unfortunately, many people today who frown against adultery (sex with someone other than your spouse) do not give a hoot about premarital sex (fornication) which is sex before or without marriage.

Steve Harvey

This same issue recently came up in one online forum that I contributed to. A bewildered participant had asked, “Why has premarital sex become a norm in our society today?”

Here was my contribution in the discussion that ensued:

…Our sense of morality has been decaying over the years. But anyone who is born again knows that premarital sex is not normal; it is a sin against God.

For those who say that premarital sex is okay because of civilisation, my answer to them is that civilisation is not the same thing as promiscuity.

As I would often say, both premarital sex and extramarital sex are the devil’s ideas. Those who love God should desist from such.

Does that mean God doesn’t want His children to have sex? No, of course God wants it, because He created it. But He approves of sex only within the confines of marriage.

So take it or leave it, anyone who has sex with someone he or she is not married to is having an illicit sex. And illicit sex is a sin against God.

In a way, this should bother you, except of course if you have no iota of the fear of God in you.

Conclusions

God doesn’t hate sex, but He wants you to be married before engaging in it. So if you are a child of God and you want to live as one, you should know that despite the popularity of Steve Harvey’s 90-day rule, marriage is the only God-approved license for sex.

Until someone marries you, he or she has not acquired the right to be intimate with you. So the correct rule to follow while dating is really not about holding off sex for only 90 days, but about holding off completely until you are married.

Whether the time from when you meet your dating partner to the time you get married is exactly 90 days, less than 90 days or more than 90 days, the right thing for you to do is to wait until you are married before engaging in any sexual activity. Anything short of that is living below the good standard God has set for you.


What’s your take on the 90-day rule in a dating ?

Ravi Zacharias, A Good Christian Soldier Goes Home

“Ravi Zacharias, who spent his life defending Christianity through books and lectures, has died. He was 74.”

That was how CNN reported the death of internationally renown Christian apologists, Dr Ravi Zacharias on 19 May, 2020.

Before seeing that post, I was already aware of that news via an earlier blog post on Bruce Cooper’s Reason Cases for Christ. And my first reaction was, “We have lost a great Christian apologist. Ravi will be greatly missed…”

A friend of mine who is also an ardent admirer of Ravi’s, reacted in a similar tone: “Yeah, Ravi will be greatly missed. His contribution to Christian Apologetics was immense.”

Although I never got to meet him personally in his lifetime, I have read a couple of his articles and also listened to his recorded audio or video messages.

In all, I am convinced that Ravi was a man of very deep spiritual convictions.

He was a good soldier of Christ who travelled across several seas, oceans and mountains around the world propagating and defending the gospel of Jesus Christ. He was not afraid to tackle difficult questions around the Christian faith and was willing to engage the thinker at their level.

He even founded an organisation whose driving “goal is to touch both the heart and the intellect of the thinkers and influencers in society by tackling some of the toughest questions about faith and providing thoughtful answers.”

From the time he made the full commitment to follow God at the tender age of 17, he never looked back till he breathed his last at the ripe age of 74 years old, in sharing the Gospel.

An obituary statement from his organisation, RZIM, sheds a little light on Ravi’s lifelong passion for sharing the gospel of our Lord, Jesus Christ:

“…It was the culmination of a remarkable transformation set in motion when Zacharias, recovering in a Delhi hospital from a suicide attempt at age 17, was read the words of Jesus recorded in the Bible by the apostle John: “Because I live, you will also live.” In response, Zacharias surrendered his life to Christ and offered up a prayer that if he emerged from the hospital, he would leave no stone unturned in his pursuit of truth. Once Zacharias found the truth of the gospel, his passion for sharing it burned bright until the very end. Even as he returned home from the hospital in Texas, where he had been undergoing chemotherapy, Zacharias was sharing the hope of Jesus to the three nurses who tucked him into his transport.”

In the passing on to glory of Frederick Antony Ravi Kumar Zacharias, the Christian world has lost a great man who was inbued with both the intellectual and spiritual capacities to advance Christian Apologetics not only in friendly Christian circles but also in not-so-friendly political and academic arenas.


What’s your opinion about Ravi Zacharias’ passing on to glory?

Two Things That Struck Me About Alexander The Great

When you flip through the pages of history, the things you read will either make you proud or humble.

I was inbued with a sense of humility as I read the biography of Alexander The Great. His life on earth was not long but he achieved international fame.

You don’t have to be a good student of history to have heard anything about King Alexander. Though he lived several centuries ago, people in our days have not ceased making reference to him in their speeches and strategy meetings.

What made Alexander great
Alexander the Great, source: Wikipedia

As I studied about him, I began to better appreciate some of the things that made Alexander truly great, namely his many military and political conquests.

Of course there are other things about him that history did not forget to record. According to biography.com:

  • Alexander the Great was born in the Pella region of the Ancient Greek kingdom of Macedonia on July 20, 356 B.C., to parents King Philip II of Macedonia and Queen Olympia;
  • His mum, Queen Olympia became his role model because his dad, the King, was always absent from home – due to extended military campaigns.
  • Alexander was a student of the notable philosopher, Aristotle, studying “philosophy, poetry, drama, science and politics.”
  • Alexander was a teenager when he became a soldier and embarked on his first military expedition;
  • Two years after joining the army, he “took charge of the Companion Cavalry and aided his father in defeating the Athenian and Theban armies at Chaeronea.”
  • With the support of the army and his mum, Alexander claimed the throne at the of 20 years following the murder of his father, the king.
  • As king, Alexander went on to conquer several empires and territories including Egypt, where he founded the City, Alexandria, “designed as a hub for Greek culture and commerce.”
Who founded Alexandria city in Egypt

As you can see, Alexander the Great achieved so much in his short lifetime, but there are two things that struck me most about him:

  • How he died, and
  • The age he died.

1. How Alexander the Great died

“Some historians say Alexander died of malaria or other natural causes; others believe he was poisoned…”.(history.com)

However, one source, is categoric about what killed King Alexander:

“Conqueror and king of Macedonia, Alexander the Great… During his leadership, from 336 to 323 B.C., he united the Greek city-states and led the Corinthian League. He also became the king of Persia, Babylon and Asia, and created Macedonian colonies in the region. While considering the conquests of Carthage and Rome, Alexander died of malaria in Babylon (now Iraq), on June 13, 323 B.C” (emphasis added).

Alexander the Great died of malaria! For a man who conquered numerous nations and territories to have been felled by ‘common’  malaria was quite surprising.

What killed Alexander the Great

For the records, malaria is “A disease caused by a plasmodium parasite, transmitted by the bite of infected mosquitoes.”

So you can say that all it took to kill a man as a great as King Alexander was a bite of infested mosquito.

Unfortunately, several centuries after such a great leader was felled, malaria has continued to be a killer disease in endemic countries.

One report by the World Health Organisation, WHO, has it that, “In 2017, there were an estimated 435 000 deaths from malaria globally, compared with 451 000 estimated deaths in 2016, and 607 000 in 2010.

“Children aged under 5 years are the most vulnerable group affected by malaria. In 2017, they accounted for 61% (266 000) of all malaria deaths worldwide.”

In Alexander the Great, malaria killed a historically great world leader. In over 61% of the under fives victims of the disease today, malaria continues to kill children who might have become great leaders of the world.

2. The age at which Alexander died

Available records show that king Alexander was born on July 20, 356 B.C., and died on June 13, 323 B.C. That means he died at the age of 32 years old (shortly before his 33rd birthday).

Considering the fact that he became king at the age of 20 years old, it means he had less than 13 years to achieve all the military and political victories that are attributed to him today. Yet, it would seem that he had more than a lifetime of a few decades to rise to the top of global political fame.

One thing is clear from this, Alexander’s life is a testament to the saying that “It is not how long but how well you live” that matters.

It reminds me of our Lord Jesus Christ. He lived for only 33 and 1/2 years, yet His impact remains eternal.

Irrespective of how long or short we live on earth, we should make an impact.


What do you say?

Six Different Tests You Can Use When Making Decisions (According to Pastor Rick Warren)

Every day you are presented with the opportunity to make certain decisions. Sometimes, you know what to do and sometimes you don’t.

Sometimes your decisions come out good and you are glad. But sometimes, your decisions bring you nothing but guilt and shame, of which you are sad.

How can you avoid the trap of making those decisions that will make you regret at the end of the day?

Are there simple checks you can carry out to be sure you will not make decisions that end up bringing you shame and guilt?

This post will get you (more) aquainted with the necessary questions you should ask yourself before committing to a decision.

In his Daily Hope Devotional, best-selling author, pastor Rick Warren outlines six different tests you can use when making decisions:

How to make beneficial decisions

1. Ideal Test:

Is this in harmony with God’s Word?
For many decisions, the Bible offers instructions or a clear principle to follow. When you’re making a decision, consider whether God’s Word speaks directly to what you should do.

2. Integrity Test:

Would I want everyone to know about this decision that I’m making?
When you’re a person of integrity, who you are on the inside matches who you are on the outside. Who you are in private is the same as who you are in public.

3. Improvement Test:

Will this make me a better person?
In your life, you often won’t be choosing between good and evil, but between better and best. Have a high standard and fill your life with the best.

4.Independence Test:

Could this begin to control and dominate my life?
Even if something isn’t bad on the surface, it’s bad for you if it becomes an addiction. Christ is the only one who deserves control in your life.

5. Influence Test: 

Will this harm other people?
Our culture asks: What do you need? But God demands that you think of other people, too. If a decision you make will harm other people, it’s the wrong decision.

6. Investment Test:

Is this the best use of my time?
You don’t have time for everything, and God doesn’t expect you to do everything. Figure out the mission God has for you. Invest your time in that.


Which one of the above tests appeals to you most?

Dealing With The Time Element Involved In God’s Promises For Our Lives

When we talk about God’s promise for our lives, we refer to “a solemn pledge, [by God] to perform or grant a specified thing” based on His grace and faithfulness.

As children of God, we have various promises He has promised to perform in our lives. And as you already know, these promises do not take place automatically; a time element is usually involved.

There is always a time lag between when the promises were given and when they are fulfilled in our lives. And it makes a lot of difference how we handle this period in between.

How then do we handle this time element? In her book, “Possess Your Promised Land,” Fuchsia Pickett gives us the following advice:

“We must be careful not to allow unbelief to grow during a time period that seems to delay the promise of God. God uses time as a tool for the testing of our hearts to bring us into dependence on his supernatural power and childlike trust in His ways.”

Therefore in dealing with the time element involved involved in the promise of God for your life, you must at least do the following:

  • Don’t allow unbelief to begin to grow in you. In other words, stay in faith;
  • Realise that the time element is being used to test your heart’s commitment to God to bring you to trust in Him completely.

God’s promises are sure. But you have to properly position yourself to receive their fulfillment:

You must pass the test: trust God completely and wait patiently for His timing.

This is in line with the teachings in Hebrews chapter 6 verses 11-12, where faith and patience are mentioned as the two ingredients we need to apply to inherit the promise:

“We want each of you to show this same diligence to the very end, so that what you hope for may be fully realized. We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised.”
Hebrews 6:11‭-‬12 NIV


What do you think?

The Church Girl 1 – A Book Review

Thanks to the covid 19 lockdown, I was finally able to have the needed free time to rummage through my bookshelf for some books I had always wanted to read but never had the sufficient time to do so.

One of such books was The Church Girl. I was delighted to still have the autographed copies, which I had erroneously assumed had been ‘borrowed’ off the shelf.

The texts in the following paragraphs are my humble attempt at reviewing the book.

About The Book

The Church Girl 1 is about Mary, an orphaned teenager who was saddled with the enormous task of fending for herself and her three siblings.

She soon felt that life had given her more responsibilities than she could shoulder alone. But who would help her out?

Books by Ufuomaee

In her quest for some financial help, she approached her pastor, a very popular man of God in town.

But this unscrupulous pastor took advantage of Mary’s vulnerability by extracting an agreement from her that she would meet the pastor’s ‘needs’ in exchange for whatever financial support he would provide for her.

That marked the beginning of a covert intimate relationship between the 16-year old girl and the pastor, which lasted for the next six years…

Unfortunately, this type of situation often plays out in real life in some our churches’ leaderships, where some so-called men of God do immorrally take advantage of their innocent members.

But sexual sin should not be condoned amongst the clergy. Wherever such exists, I think there should not be cover-ups any more.

Let the truth be made known and let justice prevail, where necessary.

What happened to Mary?

All hell was let loose after Mary met Ifeanyi whom she thought could be the man of her dreams and more. But just when she was being introduced to the would-be suitor’s family, she was discovered to be pregnant for the randy pastor Bolaji.

About the same period, although now newly born again, Ifeanyi’s past began to hunt him; to his dismay, he found out that his ex girlfriend was expecting his baby.

And this other girl was poised to spoil the show for him by all means…

How did Mary and Ifeanyi navigate through these awkward situations?

Did they get to fulfill their burning desires to be joined as man and wife?

Or did they painfully go their separate ways?

What happened to pastor Bolaji? Was he exposed?

What about Ifeanyi’s ex, Ijeoma? Was she able to scheme her way back to Ifeanyi’s life? Or was she destined to be with another man?

The answers to these questions formed the intrigues that vividly played out on the pages of the book.

My favourite character

Unlike in other books by the same author that I previously reviewed, I could not choose a favourite character from The Church Girl 1.

There were things to learn from each of the characters but quite honestly I couldn’t make up my mind on whom to confer the award of the favourite character.

About the Author

Ufuoma Emerhor-Ashogbon
Ufuomaee – Author of The Church Girl 1&2

The Church Girl 1 is another Christian genre classic contribution from beautiful Ufuomaee.

You will remember her if you have been a long time reader of this blog because I have also reviewed some of her books in the past.

Ufuomaee is also the author of The House Girl and Perfect Love  and the prolific writer of the blog, Grace and Truth.

Final thoughts

The Church Girl 1 was written in a simple, easy to read and understand narrative. It has plenty of life’s lessons that could be learned from it, especially from a Christian worldview.

Therefore, I will not hesitate to recommend it to everyone, especially to young adults and parents.


Thank you for reading!

You can share your own thoughts in the comment section.

Covid 19 Pandemic: Beyond The Conspiracy Theories

The novel coronavirus also known as covid 19 is still ravaging various parts of the world. Although concerted efforts are being made to contain the pandemic, the global picture is still very gloomy.

For a disease as deadly as the coronavirus pandemic, it will make a lot of sense for us to figure out and be absolutely sure what caused it – for posterity sake.

But going by various reports monitored on social media, there is hardly a worldwide consensus as to the actual cause of the disease. As a result, several conspiracy theories exist…

Right or wrong, many people believe that the deadly strain of virus causing the pandemic was passed from wild animals to humans. This was the report that came of out Wuhan City, China, where the disease was reported to have originated from.

In addition, there are also insinuations in some quarters that the virus is nothing but a secretly contrived biological weapon that couldn’t be contained any more.

Some other people called it a covert chemical weapon development experiment that backfired.

There was also another theory that the covid 19 pandemic is nothing but the hazardous radiation consequence of the 5G communication technology purportedly deployed in some cities of the world.

It is not for me to argue here whether or not these claims are correct. It is a matter of time, the truth will be fully revealed.

But beyond the so-called conspiracy theories surrounding the remote cause of the covid 19 pandemic, no one can deny that there was an actual disease outbreak across the world that is making actual human beings suffer, leading to actual multiple deaths and actual global lockdowns.

As at the time of writing this post, over two million individual cases of this deadly infection have been cumulatively reported globally. And this has resulted in actual human deaths of not less than one hundred and fifty thousand persons.

Economic effects of coronavirus pandemic
Source: worldometer.info

Unfortunately, those numbers are most likely to go up over the next days or weeks pending when the vaccine for the prevention and treatment of the infection is developed and made commercially available.

Consequent upon the pandemic, our lives are no longer the same as our lives have been disrupted in more ways than one.

Most cities where the disease have been reported have been placed on lockdown pending when the pandemic is contained.

“Stay safe, stay at home,” we are told. This means that we can hardly go where we want to go and when we want to go.

And no one is sure when the lockdown order will be lifted.

Global productivity is declining across world economies because most hardworking people who are supposed to be at work are now resting at home due to no fault of theirs.

We all know that, “Work from home” is a cliche that isn’t possible for all the baskets of employees presently on lockdown.

The only people that are fully engaged at this time are our health or medical workers. They are working tirelessly and risking their own lives to save the lives of those who are battling with the pandemic.

Major employers continue to pay salaries to their staff even when majority of their staff are observing the stay-at-home order. Don’t ask me how long this will be sustained!

Nations and governments of the word are humbled. Just one plague has proven that despite the hyped advances in medicine, our healthcare system is still very much challenged.

As one wag puts it, the nations of the world are prepared for war but none is prepared for a plague such as covid 19. Isn’t that an irony?

Time will fail me to begin to talk about the job losses, lost or depleted investments, and other forms of economic hardships caused by the covid 19 pandemic. We are all already feeling the impact in one way or another!

Therefore, whether or not the people of the world come to a consensus as to the actual cause of the coronavirus pandemic, none of us can deny the fact that beyond the conspiracy theories in circulation, the pandemic has adversely affected our lives in all ramifications.

And I doubt that the world will remain the same once this battle of containing the spread of the pandemic is over.


Please let me know what you think in the comment section.

20+ Questions To Help You Re-strategise For Life After The Lockdown

Hopefully, the current lockdown will soon come to an end. But while it lasts, take some time out to re-strategise for your life after the lockdown.

Here are a few questions to help you re-strategise for the life after covid 19 lockdown:

1. Are you going to continue in paid employment or you will resign to start a business?

2. If you are in business, should you close down your business (not recommended) or sell it off and go back to paid employment?

3. Which relationships are you going to develop or discontinue after the lockdown? (divorce is not recommended).

4. Are you going to make a career change from one industry to another or you will remain where you are?

5. In addition to your current job or business, what other things can you do legitimately in order to improve your cashflow?

6. If you are working at a geographical location different from where your family is based, are you ready to relocate so you can be with your family?

7. Were you satisfied with the way your government, or employer responded to the challenge posed by covid 19? If your answer is no, what are your suggestions for them to do better?

Life after a lockdown

8. What are the vital lessons you learnt during the lockdown period that you can apply afterwards in your life?

9. Did you develop any business idea during the lockdown? If your answer is yes, have you written the business plan?

10. Based on your experience of working at home during the lockdown, are you going to change the way you work so that you can work more or less hours from home?

11. In what ways are you going to reorder your priorities after the experience of lockdown?

12. How did the covid 19 pandemic and the resultant lockdown affect your belief in the existence (or non-existence) of God?

13. Did it ever cross your mind that ‘what if you had contracted and died from the coronavirus disease’?

14. How has the covid 19 lockdown changed personal views about life?

Investment decisions post covid 19 pandemic.

15. Base on what you are going through in the lockdown, what will be the direction of your future financial investments?

16. Are you going to retain or sell off your existing investment portfolios?

17. Are you going to relocate your family to another state or country?

18. Will you take any vacations again throughout this year?

19. Which extra curricular activity did you engage in during the lockdown period that you want to continue to do post-lockdown?

Maximizing your life during a lockdown

20. Did you establish any physical exercise routine that you would love to continue after the lockdown?

21. Did you put on so much weight during the lockdown that you would want to shed some afterwards?

22. Was there any bad social habit (smoking, alcohol drinking, late-night keeping, infidelity etc) you quit during the lockdown period that you don’t want to go back to?

23. Did you write any article, ebook, during the lockdown that you intend to publish? If yes, what’s the plan to have it published?

24. How productive were you as a writer, or blogger during the lockdown?


I hope you found any of the questions helpful in deciding how you want your life to look like once the lockdown is over.

My humble advice is that whatever happens afterwards, make sure your life comes out better (not worse) than it was before the lockdown.

Thank you for reading and please let me know what you think.

In His Resurrection

In His birth
Divinity became enwrapped in humanity
For the salvation of mankind.

In His death
Divinity suffered in the hands of humanity
Paying the price for the salvation of mankind.

In His resurrection
Divinity had Him forever established
As the only Saviour of mankind.


©2020|Victor Uyanwanne

Are You Restrategising For The Life After Covid 19 Lockdown

How will your life change after the covid 19 lockdown? Or is it possible that it’s not going to change at all?

As you know, this lockdown is not going to continue forever. At some point in future (no matter how long that will take), the stay-at-home order will be lifted.

When that happens, what are you going to do? Go back to life as usual? Or make some necessary changes?

I guess you will have to make some adjustments to the way you live your life.

covid 19 lockdown~23579404590662637398..jpg

One effect of the covid 19 lockdown is that it has already reshaped the way we do things. And I’m convinced that life is not going to be the same for most of us after this experience.

If that is so, I will advise you to make some changes to your life’s plan or else the change might have to be forced on you.

For that you have to do some restrategising. This will be further addressed in the next post.

Use this lockdown period to think about your life, reorder your priorities, set new goals for your career, family, business, education, relationship, etc.

After the covid 19 lockdown, please don’t be afraid to implement some positive changes to your life. 


What do you say?

Jesus Still Died And Resurrected

Coronavirus lockdown or not, Jesus still died and resurrected. We shouldn’t stop talking about it, no matter the condition we find ourselves.

A few days from now, Christiandom will be celebrating the Easter, an annual event to mark the death and resurrection of the Lord Jesus Christ.

In times like this, even though it may seem that the coronavirus pandemic is taking the shine off the event, it doesn’t change the historical fact that Jesus still died and resurrected.

Easter celebration is important because without the resurrection of Jesus Christ, Christianity would be another dead religion. As Paul wrote in his first letter to the Corrinthians,

“if Christ has not been raised, then our preaching is vain [useless, amounting to nothing], and your faith is also vain [imaginary, unfounded, devoid of value and benefit—not based on truth].” 1 Corinthians 15:14 AMP

While we stay locked down at home over the Covid 19 scare, it should not prevent us from appreciating and celebrating the benefits of the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ for us.

So join me to say All hail king Jesus who died to redeem us.

Happy Easter celebration to you all.

7 Broad Ways To Maximise Your Life During A Lockdown

The city where you live or work may be on a lockdown but your life should not be on a shutdown. Even as much movement is restricted, there are things you can do within your home to maximise your life during the lockdown.

Due to the covid 19 pandemic movement of people around the world has been largely restricted. The slogan is now “stay at home”,  “stay safe,” or “work from home.”

However, not everyone is equipped with the facility to work from home. So apart from working, what else can you do to maximize your time at home in a period of lockdown?

How to use your time well during a lockdown

In a previous post on this blog, I advanced some broad guidelines to maximise your time at home during a lockdown. This post is my attempt at throwing more light into the ideas broached in that introductory post.

Let’s enjoy the ride together.

1. Do things that will rejuvenate you

In this fast-paced world, an average human being is stressed out, overstretched and overused. Now that you are on lockdown, I would expect that you make deliberate effort at renewing your energy.

There are three areas of your life that you should touch in this regard: spirit, soul and body.

As a human being, you are a spirit, you live in a body and you have a soul. How much have you taken good care of these individual parts of you over the years?

Here are my suggestions on how you can rejuvenate you:

Exercising at home during a lock down

A) Your spirit – be in tune with your Creator. Develop/maintain a personal relationship with Him. Worship Him. Talk to Him in prayer. Seek to know Him more by studying His Word.

B) Your body – This is the time to stay long in bed without feeling guilty; have maximum sleep/rest hours. Eat healthy foods and engage in appropriate physical exercises.

C) Your soul – read as many relevant books as you can during this period. Meditate too (here I mean, imaginative thinking, not emptying your mind). Also engage in writing. Just write.

2. Do things that can rekindle your lost or strained relationships of interest

I can understand that because you have been so busy all these years, you didn’t have the time to nurture or maintain some relationships that might have been mutually beneficial to you and the other person. Please use this lockdown period to reach out and rebuild.

Of course I know your movement has been restricted to your house so physical visitation to someone is out of the question. But thank God for technology, we have super fast ways to contact people that interest us.

Ways to rekindle a relationship.

Make a call, send a text message or chat, send an email communicating your love and care. I guarantee you the feeling and outcome will be worth it for you (and the person on the other side).

If you don’t know who to start with, let me give you some ideas: your parents, siblings, uncle or aunt that you haven’t spoken with (at least) in the last three months.

What about people that the only time you talked to them was to say Merry Christmas or Happy New Year two years ago? Call them now and have a normal conversation with them.

Practical Exercise:

Before you continue reading, please pull out your pen and writing pad now. Write down the names of 5 to 10 people you should contact immediately either through phone call (strongly recommended), text messages, online chats or email.

Reach out to them once you are done reading this post. I will be overjoyed to hear your feedback.

Sexual satisfaction in marriage

3. Pay more attention to your spouse’s emotional needs

Prior to this time, you have been so busy you have not given sufficient attention to satisfying your spouse’s emotional needs. Lockdown has changed everything now.

With the lockdown, there is enough time to focus on specially loving your spouse. Give each other maximum pleasure and satisfaction.

You don’t have any excuse not to engage in love-making with your spouse during this lockdown period. Do it well and do it often.

Let down your guards and be vulnerable to each other. Listen to whatever your spouse has to say, after all you are not running late for any meeting now.

4. Have more family time

The lockdown has afforded you more time to spend with your entire family. Use it to engage in activities that promote bonding more with your spouse and your children.

You will have noticed that you have missed out a lot from the goings-on in their lives while you were busy with your career, job, business, education or whatever it is that had kept you away from your family before the lockdown.

Now that you are around at home with them, play educational games together. Watch family-friendly movies together. Eat together. Pray together. Study the Bible together.

Family eating together, praying together.

Tell stories to your kids and let them share their own thoughts too. Ask them about their friends, their interests and ambitions.

No judging – just listen to them. You will have a good laugh listening to them.

5. Reach out with a helping hand to some needy persons around you

Let’s face it, the lockdown has caused much economic hardship to some people around you or a far off. It’s time to reach to such people.

Not everyone is as blessed as you are. Even if you think these are not the best times for you economically, remember that there are people that are worse off than you are.

Bottom line, no matter your economic estate, you can still reach out and bless someone around you with whatever you have. Be it some items of groceries or sanitary items, I’m sure they will be received with appreciation.

Some people will need money, so you can do a bank transfer to their accounts. (Thanks to all the celebrities who reports monitored on social media show that they have been transfering some funds to the accounts of some of their poor followers).

6. Learn a new skill

This lockdown period is not too short for you to acquire a new skill or improve on existing ones. And you don’t need to be in a formal classroom to achieve that goal.

In this age of information technology, you can learn virtually anything online. The videos are there on YouTube for free. Just search search out the one you want and get started.

For instance, you can learn, or improve on your knowledge of, excel spreadsheet, power point presentation, photo-editing, etc.

How about topping up your culinary skills? Can’t you learn how to make ice cream at home during this lockdown? What about dough-nut, pop corn and your other favourite snacks at home?

Whatever it is you have to learn within this available time, just learn it. No more excuse of “I don’t have enough time…”

What I wish for you is to be better equipped when you emerge at the other side of the lockdown. Make it possible.

Post lockdown restrategising

7. Begin to re-strategise or plan for your life post-lockdown

As you know, this lockdown is not going to continue forever. At some point in future (no matter how long that will take), the stay-at-home order will be lifted.

When that happens, what are you going to do? Go back to life as usual?

I guess you will have to make some adjustments to the way you live your life. One effect of the covid 19 lockdown is that it has reshaped the way we do things.

I’m convinced that life is not going to be the same for most of us after this experience. If that is so, I will advise you to make some changes to your life’s plan or else the change might have to be forced on you.

My point is, use this lockdown period to think about your life, reorder your priorities, setting new goals for your career, family, business, education, relationship, etc.


What do you think?

Covid 19 Pandemic: Can Prayer Save The Day?

We often say in Christian circles that “prayer is the master key,” “there is nothing prayer cannot do,” “if there is a man to pray, there is a God to answer,” and so on and so forth.

All these statements underscore our strong belief in the efficacy of prayers in resolving difficult situations. And I am convinced that in our individual lives, we all have had instances where prayer saved the day for us in our moments of crisis.

That’s at a personal level. But can we extend it to a global level? I believe we can!

Right now the world is experiencing a health crisis caused by coronavirus. Many people have died already as a result of the disease.

Regrettably, more people will still die until the medical world is able to find a lasting solution to the pandemic.

For now, most health personnel and health facilities around the world have been stretched beyond bounds, yet the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel is not in sight.

Is there any thing we can do as believers to help stem the tide of this evil disease? I believe there is:

We can pray!

Can prayer save the day for us in the face of a ravaging global pandemic such as covid 19? Again, I believe it can.

So it is time for all believers in Christ Jesus to join hands in prayers in order to win the battle against the coronavirus pandemic. If you have started praying already, please don’t  give up until the victory is won.

We have the assurance of God that He will hear us and intervene for us in a difficult time such as we are experiencing right now in the world.

If my people who are called by my name

Going by the various reports monitored on social media, there are already several calls to prayer coming from different cycles, ranging from pastors, concerned individuals, ministries and so on. We all need to heed the call and pray seriously against the scourge of coronavirus.

Calling people to pray against covid 19 pandemic does not mean that we want people to undermine the essense of taking medical precautions against the disease. But they should pray in spite of having observed necessary medical precautions.

The people of the world may scoff at us for resorting to prayers, but we should not mind them; our prayer is to our God and not to them.

David realised the importance of praying to God in the middle of a national health crisis like the covid 19 pandemic and so should we. The story is there recorded in 2 Samuel chapter 24 for us to read and learn from.

From what we understood from that chapter, a terrible plague had broken out in the land as a result of David’s seemingly innocuous mistake. And I dare say that the disease was more devastating than the currently prevailing covid 19 pandemic.

How would I know that? The record in the Bible shows that the disease was so terrible that in less than three days, it had killed seventy thousand able-bodied men nationwide.

More deaths would have been recorded if David had not intervened in prayer to God. You see why we should resort to the prayer strategy?

How was the plague in king David’s era stopped? David’s spiritual eyes were opened and he saw that everyone in the city of Jerusalem was about to be destroyed as a result of the rampaging pandemic.

This knowledge led him to have an honest ‘conversation’ with God, during which he took personal responsibility for causing the plague, confessed his sins, made an acceptable sacrifice to God, pleaded with Him to intervene and the plague stopped.

In other words, the ravaging plague was held back after David prayed to the living God. So if you want the covid 19 plague to be held back, then it’s time we prayed sincerely.

As at the time of writing this post, global deaths due to Covid 19 is already above the sixty thousand mark but still less than the seventy thousand deaths that were recorded in David’s time.

Covid 19 global updates
Source: worldometer.info

Despite these recorded deaths, is there any hope that the convid 19 pandemic can be contained? I believe there is.

That’s why we should add the strategy of prayer to the fight against the coronavirus pandemic.

While the medical world continues to battle the disease and works round the clock to find a cure or a lasting solution to it, we believers in the true God should ‘cry’ out to God for divine help; help to stop further deaths, help to stop further spread of the disease and ultimately help to completely wipe out this pandemic called covid 19.


What’s your view about the call to prayer against the covid 19 pandemic?

Covid 19 Lockdown: Maximising Your Personal Time

One good thing that has come out of the covid 19 lockdown around the world is the fact that most of us now have more personal time at our disposal than we have had in many years.

With the stay-at-home order by the government, we have slowed down significantly from our fast-paced daily lives to the one where our movement has been largely restricted.

Instead of our usual up and going lifestyle, we have been constrained to an up and staying one. And suddenly we realise we now probably have more time on our hands than we can use.

Despite the lockdown, I want you to know that you can still be up and doing, even while at home.

Instead of complaining of boredom like some people are already doing, I wish for you to maximise this free time by doing some things that you have always wanted to do but never found sufficient time to do them.

For all you care, this lockdown certainly will not continue forever. So pending when our movements would no longer be restricted, endeavour to make the best use of the free time afforded to you by the coronavirus lockdown.

In that regard, permit me to suggest some broad guidelines on the things you can do:

  • Do things that will rejuvenate or strengthen your spirit, soul and body;
  • Do things that can rekindle your lost or strained relationships of interest;
  • Pay more attention to your spouse’s emotional needs, giving each other maximum pleasure and satisfaction;
  • Have more family time, engaging in activities that promote bonding with your children;
  • Reach out with a helping hand to some needy persons around you;
  • Begin to restrategise for your life post lockdown, setting new goals for your career, family etc.

I hope you found the post helpful. I shall further explore the above guidelines in a subsequent post.

For now, thank you for reading and please leave me a comment.

3 Innocuous Things About False Prophets You Should Be Wary Of

Dealing with false prophets.

For thus says the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel, ‘Do not let your [false] prophets who are among you and your diviners deceive you; pay no attention and attach no significance to the dreams which they dream or to yours,
Jeremiah 29:8 AMP

1. False prophets are always amongst you

Some one said, “if the devil would come as the devil I would know him and avoid him.” But you see, the devil is a master of disguise, so he would put on different forms to deceive you.

One of such forms is familiarity. He comes to you through things and people you are familiar with so that you will be caught off-guard.

The same thing can be said of false prophets. You can find them amongst people around you, people you already know and people that belong to the same group or church with you.

It would be a serious mistake to assume that there are no false prophets around you. Please take another look at God’s warning through Prophet Jeremiah:

“Do not let your [false] prophets who are among you and your diviners deceive you…” (emphasis mine).

Did you notice that the warning is against prophets who are amongst you, not the ones that are afar off?

Not strangers, but familiar people; those who present themselves as harmless, yet have hidden evil agenda.

Speaking along this line, Jesus echoed a warning to His disciples saying, “Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves” Matthew 7:15.

If a wolf comes as a wolf, you will see it and escape to safety. But if a wolf disguises as a sheep, you will not immediately take the requisite caution, thereby increasing the chances of your being caught unawares.

That’s the kind of danger you are exposed to with false prohets if you are not careful enough. Thankfully, you are not at their mercy.

As Jesus assures us, “You can identify them by their fruit, that is, by the way they act.”

Innocent things about a false prophet

2. False prophets want your attention

Do you have any idea of what it means to be an attention seeker? Think of someone who behaves in a certain way with a view to eliciting your attention or validation.

That’s what false prophets do; they put on shows to grab your attention.

But getting your attention is not an end in itself. What they really want is for you to believe in them as though they were true prophets.

As Jeremiah puts it, they want you to “attach some significance to their prophecies.” It is up to you whether or not to oblige them.

3. False prophets want you to attach some significance to their prophecies

Even though false prophets know in themselves that they are false and self-serving, they still want you to take them seriously.

Once they have your attention, they will want you to attach some significance to what they say. And that is where the danger really is.

But as prophet Jeremiah advises us, “pay no attention and attach no significance to the dreams which [false prophets] dream…”

In other words, when you see a false prophet, pay no attention to him or her and do not attach any significance to whatever he or she has to say.

The above advice is worth repeating: Pay no attention to a false prophet and attach no significance to his or her words. We will take a deeper look at that in the next post.


Thank you for reading and please leave me a comment.

Coronavirus Pandemic: In Times Like This

It is no longer news that coronavirus has become a global pandemic. And it has significantly impacted the way we do things at home, at work, at play and even at our worship places.

Owing to this ravaging disease, many deaths have been reported across the world. And the number is increasing daily.

Some other people are suffering in various ways: fear of infection, food shortages, lockdowns and restrictions in movements.

These are difficult times for the people of the world, to say the least. May be we are in ‘perilous times’ as the Bible calls it (see 2 Timothy 3:1).

Perilous time is a time “full of danger and risk.” In other words, this is a dangerous time around the world.

That danger and risk are occasioned by the outbreak of coronavirus also known as covid 19. Everyone is now faced with the risk of infestation and the danger of death.

People are living in palpable fear as the situation continues to go out of hand around the nations of the world, stretching medical services to the last limit.

As one commentator on an online forum puts it, “This is no ordinary – humans, nations, organisations and industries, the high and mighty are being humbled…”

But what can you do to be safe in a time like this? I will give you two suggestions in this post.

1. Follow the advice of your government or health authorities

Make it a point of duty to adhere to the safety measures proffered by your government or appropriate health authorities.

I know quite a lot has been said about this across many media but it can never be over-emphasised:

  • Practice social distancing.
  • Stay at home.
  • Maintain very strict hygienic procedures – wash and sanitise your hands regularly.
  • Properly cover your nose when you sneeze.
  • Wear nose masks especially when in public.
  • Avoid touching your face.
  • Self-isolate, where necessary.
  • Etc

These recommendations are good and should be properly upheld. But if you are a believer in Christ, I’m going to add one more thing: you should keep up your faith in God.

Dealing with coronavirus as a believer in Christ
Source: Sinach’s Instagram handle

2. Keep up your faith in God

As a believer in Christ, the outbreak of coronavirus pandemic should not make your faith waver. In fact, it should be strengthened in times like this.

And if you are not yet a believer, you might want to consider becoming one at this time. As you can see, the world is no longer the same just because of one “little plague” known as covid 19.

Effect of coronavirus on nations of the world
Source: Nairaland

Let your faith in God swallow up your fear of coronavirus or any other disease for that matter. “The just shall live by faith” says the Bible in Galatians 3:11.

In times like this, remember God’s promises of divine protection, healing and deliverance. Believe them, confess them and live my them.


Let me know what you think in the comment section.

Coronavirus : Reshaping The Way We Do Things

Spread rate of Corona virus
Source: worldometer.info

The coronavirus was reported to have broken out in Wuhan, China in 2019. But nothing much changed around the world because of it untill this year.

From that Chinese city where the virus started, it has spread to many places around the world. From Italy to Germany, UK, US, France, etc it has spread in alarming proportions.

Even my beloved country Nigeria is not spared. From just one case a month ago, a total of 50 has now been officially recorded.

If that is not alarming, the global statistics is. With over 382,000 cases and over 16,500 deaths so far around the world, the picture is really very bad.

Thankfully, over 102,500 recoveries have been reported. But the scourge has not been fully tamed.

Corona virus - global statistics
Source: worldometer.info

The result of all this is that there is fear in the land. Movements have been restricted, lifestyles altered in immense proportions, reshaping the way we do things.

In effect, life is no longer the same. Everything as we used to know it has changed, sadly not for the better yet.

Apart from the loss of lives, world economy has taken the worse hit. Most stock markets have lost a huge chunk of their value in the last few weeks.

Crude oil price is at its lowest ebb in the last five years. This is not good for Nigeria my country that depends on the sale of crude oil for 90 percent of her annual foreign exchange earnings.

Beyond that, we have seen the government take some radical decisions. Our international borders have now been shut: no going out and no coming in.

Airlines are grounded. Interstate travels also restricted.

Hand washing with soap and water or health sanitizer is one culture everyone is practicing.

People are afraid to mingle. This is the era of social distancing. For some people it is self-isolation.

The year of 2020 will surely go down in history as the year of social distancing. Everyone is trying to stay safe from Corona virus.

Federal and State government workers have been ordered to stay at home to prevent further spread of the virus. “Don’t worry, your salaries will still paid in full” assured the government.

Even the private sector employers are not left out. Many of them have ordered their staff to work from home until further notice.

Except for a few instances, working from home has not been part of our experience in this part of the world. But now the by-word has become, if you must, work from home, stay at home and stay safe.

As I am typing this I am at home, with a view to staying safe from the pandemic. Thanks to our employer, some of us don’t have to go to work this week. Yet our salaries will be paid in full.

By implication, while it is already given that most companies incomes for the year might take a deep due to coronavirus pandemic, their costs will certainly rise. It is hoped the situation doesn’t get worse.

Coronavirus scare has also affected the way we worship. By Government order, no church or mosque can gather 20 people in one place in the name of worship.

For most mega churches here, services have always been streamed online but we still preferred to attend physical fellowship.

All that has now changed. More of my fellow citizens have bought into the idea of attending online church services.

Schools around the nation have since been shut down. Scheduled weddings have been postponed. Sports, entertainment and other social events have been put on hold.

Let me stop here for now. The point has already been made. Coronavirus pandemic has reshaped the way we do things. How long this forced lifestyle change will last is something no one is yet sure of.

Global consequences of Corona virus.

In what way has the coronavirus scare reshaped your life?

How Correct Is The Claim That Atheism Is Not A Choice?

When I published The problems of atheists finally figured out on this blog, it generated many comments from my readers, especially from the so-called atheists.

As I responded to the comments one after another, I saw one that picked my interest: Atheism is not a choice. This post is a further attempt of mine to address that notion.

Is the claim that atheism is not a choice correct? I believe it is not.

In my own opinion, atheism is definitely a choice. I will like to hear what you think, but I have my own reasons for saying so.

First and foremost, believing that God exists is a choice some of us had to make. If the act of believing that God exists is a choice, the act of not believing is also a choice – whether active or passive.

Remember the saying, “Failing to plan is planning to fail.” Either way, there is a failing.

At some point, Jesus made a remarkable statement that adds credence to what we are saying here:

Anyone who isn’t with me opposes me, and anyone who isn’t working with me is actually working against me” Matthew 12:30.

You see, it’s either you have declared for Jesus or you have declared against Him.

Simply put, there is no middle ground; it’s either you have chosen to be with Jesus or you have chosen not to be with Him.

And if you have chosen not to be with Him, it means you have chosen to be against Him. Either way there is a choice and that choice is yours.

That is to say, if you believe God exists, it’s a choice you have made. If you believe He doesn’t exist, it’s also a choice you have made.

In conclusion, it is incorrect to claim that atheism is not a choice. This is because, we are all responsible for our individual choices.

What we believe is our choice, what we don’t believe is our choice.

We believe God exists, it’s our choice. We believe He doesn’t exist, it’s our choice.

So when next you hear someone say, “atheism is not a choice,” please recognise that statement for what is: a deception.


Do you agree that atheism is a choice?

3 Simple Ways To Start Empowering The Writer In You

In our previous post, we established the fact that there is a writer in you. We also added that you should be intentional about doing things that will empower that writer in you.

There are things you can begin to do right now to begin empowering the writer in you. If you are interested in finding out what they are, today is your lucky day because that’s why I’m writing this post.

Read on…

3 things you can do to start empowering the writer in you

begin to re more than before

1. Begin to read more books than you have ever done before

If your dream of becoming a writer means anything worthwhile to you, then you have to be a reader first. It is true that writers write, but it is also true that writers read a lot.

If you cannot bring yourself to the discipline of reading, you cannot subject yourself to the discipline of writing. Apart from the vast information you gain from reading, it also helps you learn the style of writing from other writers.

Read voraciously. Read wide. Don’t be intimidated by the block of texts you come across on the pages of books or on posts online.

Writing comes from reading, and reading is the finest teacher of how to write” –Annie Proulx

Read regularly every day. Don’t go to bed any day without having read something. Yes, it is that serious!

When I was studying accounting at the undergraduate level, my mantra was, “any day without studying accounting is no day.” (Thanks to a friend who gave me that idea). With that, I was able to motivate myself to study the course until I got the proper handle on it.

You may as well adopt that philosophy, so that no day will pass without you reading something. After all, you want to empower the writer in you.

2. Begin to train on the art of writing

One of the side benefits of reading is that you get to see firsthand how other writers present their works and to learn from them.

Ways to bring out the writer in you.a

To begin empowering the writer in you, apart from committing yourself to continuous reading, another thing you should do is to get trained on the art of writing.

I am not suggesting that you should go back to school for a degree in communication arts. Well if you are still very young, that might not be a bad option. But I want to believe you are eager to birth your writing career so you don’t want to waste more time!

If that is so, you can go through the quicker route. Take condensed trainings on writing. Register and attend writing workshops – both terrestrial and online.

Seek opportunities to interact with writers you admire and learn from them. After all, you want to empower the writer in you.

If learning via video is your thing, do so by any means. Thanks to Youtube, you can find numerous materials on writing to watch and learn from.

3. Start writing now

After all said and done, what is the next practical thing to start doing? You guessed right! Start writing!

If you read all the books there are to read and you attend all writing workshops possible, and you don’t get down to actually start writing, you haven’t helped yourself enough and you will still be very far from achieving your goal of becoming a writer.

Start putting pen to paper and begin to write or get your hands on your computer keyboard and start punching away. You know the computer is an obedient tool. It will record whatever you type in, and it’s not going to tell you to stop writing. So why the waste of time?

If you want to become a writer, you must start writing something. Write stories (real or imagined). One quick way to achieve that is to start blogging. So start a personal blog where you can practice writing for others to read.

Write poems, write anything that comes to your mind. Write about your experiences. Be creative, be imaginative. Just write.

At this point don’t worry about whether someone will like your write-up or not. Just write! The only book that may not be read is the one you fail to write.

In conclusion,

Don’t wait until you have become a writer to start writing. It doesn’t work that way! You can’t put the cart before the horse and expect to go anywhere.

Your dream of becoming a writer is achievable! While you wait for that to come through, start doing what you can do now: start empowering the writer in you. Read more, learn more and write more. You will get there!


What else are doing to empower the writer in you?

Empowering The Writer In You

Bring out the writer in you

There is a writer in you. And the things you do will empower or disempower him or her.

Needless to say, if you truly want to become a writer, you should be doing things that empower the writer in you. And you should be intentional in doing so.

Many people want to become writers (which is good), but only a few will actualise that dream in their lifetime.

Why?

Presumably because good writing is not an easy task to accomplish. And because it’s not that easy, many people get discouraged along the way; they give up on their dream of becoming a writer. And that’s sad!

That should not be your own story. I mean, you should not give up on your writing dream.

Giving up a dream may lead to regrets.

For the sake of emphasis, let me say it again: the fact that writing is not a cup of tea should not discourage you from pursuing your writing goals. There is no worthwhile goal in life that is not difficult to achieve.

You of all people should know that to accomplish anything great in life, you have to work hard and work smart at it. Writing is not different from that.

Benjamin Franklin's quote on writing

I know you don’t mind doing something great that is worth writing about. But don’t you also want to write something that is worth reading? I bet you do because I know you can!

I am convinced there is a writer in you. And I want to encourage you to do all you can to reveal him or her to the world.

In other words, you can actualise your dream of becoming a writer. Start preparing your mindset now.

First you have to believe that it is achievable. Then focus on it. Pursue it.

Apply yourself to writing. Be committed to it. You will achieve it sooner than you think.

Whether you like it or not, let me say it again: there is a writer inside everyone of us. Don’t let him or her die.

Start doing things that empower that writer in you. Soonest, your dream of becoming a writer will become an awesome reality.

In the next post, I will show you three simple things you can begin to do right now to start empowering the writer in you.


Do you believe there is a writer in you?

300 Posts On This Blog And Still Counting

Blogging milestone

If you are reading this now, it means you are reading the 300th post here on Victors’ Corner. And I feel really grateful for how far I have come writing the blog.

I hope you will appreciate what I mean when I say the blog was started without much serious consideration. It was just a simple step I took to share my thoughts and views to the world…

On the journey to the 300th post, I’ve grown and I’m still growing. I have had my highs and lows, a fair share of negative criticisms and thankfully some positive feedback. So now there is no looking back anymore.

What I started five years ago like a child’s play has now metamorphosed into something bigger and far significant than I had anticipated. And I’m loving the experience all together.

As at the time I published my first post, I had no idea that as many people as are reading my blog presently would be interested in whatever I had to share to the world. The only thing I was sure of was that I had something to share…

Secondly, I thought that I had found an outlet to not only share my thoughts with the world but also to hone by writing skills. And to a good extent, I am achieving those objectives already.

My sincere appreciation goes to everyone of my followers and the over forty thousand readers who have spent their valuable time reading my blog and also to all those who thought it wise to give a feedback in forms of likes for my posts and comments on the blog.

I thank you all immensely for always reading and commenting.

All time highest view.

Having come this far, I don’t intend to give up now or anytime soon; I’m promising you that I’m not going to stop writing, neither will I quit on the blogging mission. And I would count on you to continue reading and sending in as much feedback as possible.

As we begin a new journey towards the next 300 posts, let’s do it together. And also, feel free to invite your friends and family along.

Give or take, there will be something for everyone who stops by on the blog. More than ever before, my blogging mission has been strengthened and enlarged for the benefits of you my readers.

It doesn’t matter if you agree with all my views or not, your perspective is very important to me. Just let me what you think in the comment section. As always, I promise to reply all your comments.

Thank you for being there!

How Do You Spell Valentine?

What Valentine's Day means
What does Valentine’s Day mean to you?

Saint Valentine’s Day is a day set aside to celebrate love. So they say, but I have observed that too much emphasis is usually placed on romantic love at the expense of love as a virtue.

I would like to ask you: how do you spell Valentine? In other words, what does Valentine’s Day mean to you?

Some people say it’s Lovers’ Day. So if you are not married or not in a romantic relationship, you shouldn’t celebrate it?

Well, your answer to that question depends on what you believe. As you know your beliefs affect the things you do and how you do them.

If you are a believer in Christ like me, you know the word of God should guide you – whatever do. For instance, if you are not married and you are open to observing the Valentine’s Day celebration, you should know that sex should not be on the table as part of the activities to mark the day.

Don’t you know the reason? Sex is permissible by God only within the confines of marriage. So if you are not married yet, you have no business with sex – whether it is Valentine’s Day or not.

As unpopular as that opinion may sound today, it is part of what is required of us as followers of Jesus Christ. You are in disobedience if you think otherwise.

Who should be your Valentine?

I’m not suggesting you should or should not celebrate the Saint Valentine’s Day. The choice is entirely up to you. But if your desire is to please God with your life, you will agree with me that you will not celebrate with reckless abandon.

Until recently, I didn’t reckon with Saint Valentine’s Day celebration. The reason was that it was modelled around me in a way that went contrary to my ‘moral’ upbringing (forgive me if that sounds like pride).

While growing up, Valentine’s Day was about hooking up with a boy/girl friend, attending parties and even having sex. But none of those activities appealed to some of us young believers in Christ, so we thought Saint Valentine’s Day was not worth celebrating.

But then later in life, I met my wife and discovered that unlike me, she cared a little about Valentine’s Day; not in any odious way, but in a way of sharing thoughts of love with people that mattered to you, giving them gifts or being with them. So I keyed in a bit.

Since then every Valentine’s Day I get her a little gift to ‘show’ my thought of love towards her, without any elaborate celebrations. And that’s all there is for me.

I remember there was a year all I could get her was a strand of rose I bought off the shelf in a supermarket. The most important thing was that I showed her I cared (and I still do).

You may say I could do better than that. Yes, you are probably right, but please let’s leave that discussion for another day.

May be your experience is different from mine, that’s fine! That’s why I’m writing this post: to hear from you what Valentine’s Day means to you.

I will like to conclude this way: If they say Valentine’s Day is a day to celebrate love, then we should not make it all about romance and sex. It should be about love in the truest sense of it: loving God with all your heart and loving your neighbour as yourselves.


Why You Should Make Jesus Your Valentine

Make Jesus your Valentine

Every February 14th, the Saint Valentine’s Day is celebrated in many places around the world. On that day, people want to be with those they love or with those that love them, expressing their love to one another either in words or in action or both as the case may be.

Irrespective of whatever form the Valentine’s day is celebrated, the bottom line is the individual quest to satisfy the need to love and be loved. Unfortunately, many of such quests for love end up in disappointments.

What if you found the Love that never fails? What if I told you there is a kind of love you can bank on every time and not just on Valentine’s Day?

What if I told you Jesus is the most special One you need to be with? What if I told you, you have everything to gain and nothing to lose if you made Jesus your Valentine?

Jesus is ready to be your Valentine for life if you would let Him. He is ready to be the most special person in your life.

Why should you make Jesus your Valentine? This post gives you three fundamental reasons.

Valentine's Day celebration

Three Reasons You Should Make Jesus Your Valentine – Your Most Special One

1. Jesus loves you completely and unconditionally

You will never find a lover like Jesus, who loves you 100% and over. And He loves you irrespective of your estate in life, your racial background or your religious affiliation.

Jesus loves you without reservations, and without limits. His love for you is not tied to your performance – whatever you do, He loves you anyway.

His love is already freely given and it’s yours for the taking. So make Him your Valentine and accept His love into your heart. This will make a whole lot of difference in your life.

i love you illustration

2. Jesus forgives your sins completely

Jesus loves you so much He gave His life to earn forgiveness for all your sins.

Every human being alive has the question of sin to grapple with. The Bible says, “All have sinned and come short of the glory of God.” But you see, you don’t have to remain a sinner for the rest of your life.

The simple advice I will give you is this: even though you were born a sinner, don’t die a sinner. The only way not to die a sinner is to consciously, willingly and wholeheartedly identify with Jesus as your Lord and personal Saviour.

Make Him your Valentine – your special One. Begin to love Him back because, as we noted earlier, He already loves unconditionally and completely.

3. Jesus protects your interest eternally

When you accept the unconditional love of God into your heart and also receives forgiveness for all your sins, you enter into a special relationship with God that extends beyond your lifetime. He will be with you while you are alive on earth and you will be with Him when you pass on to the other side of this life.

In other words, if you would identify with Jesus here on earth, He will protect your interest in this world and in the world to come. You may have heard some people say that this life is all there is; that there is no life after death.

That position is in correct because the Bible clearly shows that there is life after death. And that life after death can only be spent with God in Heaven or with Satan in hell.


You can make Jesus the most special in your life. He loves you more than anyone else. He paid the price for the forgiveness of your sins and He is the only One that guarantees your future eternally.

The choice is yours to make and your lifetime is your only chance to make it. So would you like to make Jesus your Valentine for life? Leave a comment.


Top 5 Posts In 2019

I have previously written about my favourite post in 2019. The choice of that post was based entirely on what I liked about it and the effect it had on me.

Victor Uyanwanne

I’m going further by presenting to you the top 5 posts on this blog for the year 2019. But this time, the choice is based solely on the posts with the highest number of likes by my wordpress readers.

Thanks to the blog’s analytics, the ranking has already been done for me automatically and it is my pleasure to run through it with you:

I hope you will find some new gems as you review the five most liked posts in 2019 with me:

1. Blogging for personal development

This post ranked at no. 2 in 2018, but it climbed to the first position in 2019.

In that post, I shared my personal experience regarding how blogging has contributed to my personal development in several ways. I’m convinced that anyone who has blogged for at least a year could identify with some of the points highlighted in the post.

And if you are someone that has been dragging your feet on starting a blog, reading that post might motivate you to launch your blog without further delay.

2. Racism in America Vs Tribalism in Nigeria

This post was at the top of the ladder a year ago in 2018 before being displaced to the second place in the year under review. It compared the issue of racism in America with that of tribalism in Nigeria.

America has the biggest economy in the world and Nigeria holds the ace in Africa. Beyond that comparison, there is another parallel that can be drawn between the two giants.

While racism exists [in America  and everywhere else] as a result of differences in colour of the skin, tribalism [in Nigeria and in other places] hinges on differences in birth-roots. The post recognised that both racism and tribalism are common societal evils that must be dealt a decisive blow in order for us to have a better world.

3. Dear new blogger: 7 things I would like you to know

This post became a new entrant into the top 5 hall of fame during the just outgone year. You will find the tips in the post to be very helpful in your blogging experience, most especially if you are a new kid on the block of personal blogging.

You can learn from those ahead of you in the blogging world without having to repeat the inevitable mistakes they had to make while they were just starting off. For instance, I found that having a blog is like having a baby; you have to nurture it, feed it regularly and ensure that it remains healthy. 

4. Eight simple reasons I do not follow your blog

This 2018 third-position-ranked post remained popular in 2019 (although a little less than it was in the year before). I want to believe that no blogger hates having followers. And you don’t want to be the author of a blog that no-one wants to follow.

So if people are not following your blog, there must be some reasons they are not doing so and they are worth finding out. The post is my personal take on why I don’t follow some blogs.

5. Six simple reasons to forgive offences

From no. 4 position in 2018, this post moved a step down to no. 5 in 2019. But that does not undermine the importance of the central message of the post: we should find reasons to forgive offences because they will surely come.

Those who have not known how to forgive offences have not known how to be happy. You erode your capacity to be happy if you refuse to forgive those and anyone who offend you.

Revenge

In conclusion

I hope you enjoyed going through the review of some of my most liked posts in 2019, like I did?

However, you would appreciate the fact that the purpose of the review is not to give myself a pat on the back or to blow my trumpet. Rather, I just want to highlight some of the most liked posts in order to expose them to more readership.

I must add that doing the review has done me a personal good. I could see that most of the these top posts under review were published in the year 2018 and none of my posts in 2019 made it to that hall of fame.

More so, from my little beginning in 2015, this blog has done progressively better each year till 2018. But the onward trend was not sustained in 2019.

And that’s a humbling realisation for me because it shows that I will have to up the game in the nascent year by publishing more posts that enrich the reading experience of my wordpress audience.

Let’s stop here and look forward to what lies ahead for us in the blogging journey of 2020. Thank you for reading and don’t forget to leave a comment.

What’s Your Favourite Post This Year?

Best post in 2019

I hope you enjoyed yourself writing posts on your blog this year? If yes, then consider the subject question as part of the review of your blogging activities for the outgoing calender year.

Looking back now, which one of your posts written in 2019 would you consider your most favourite?

In this post is my simple answer to that same question, and it is in response to a SlimJim’s A question for bloggers: What is your favourite post that you wrote for 2019?

As he rightly pointed out in his short post, your favourite post for the year doesn’t necessarily mean the most popular post on your blog. But rather, the one you really like yourself or you enjoyed writing most or that challenged you or inspired you the most –  whether or not it gathered many views, likes and comments.

For me, I think my favourite post for 2019 will be one of my midyear posts entitled The problem of atheists finally figured out. It was the second post I published after I carefully studied one of the hottest interactions between Jesus and some of the pretentious religious leaders of the day – the Pharisees.

In a way, I came to realise that there is a similarity between the attitude of the then Pharisees and the modern day atheists, especially the ones online.

As someone who frequently engages in online conversations with atheists visiting this blog, I have often wondered why most of them say the (foolish) things they say about God and the notion of His existence.

“Why can’t they just get it?” I have often asked under my breath.

However my bewilderment got relieved when I heard Jesus vehemently point out the mistakes of the Pharisees as recorded in the Gospels: “Your mistake is that you don’t know the Scriptures, and you don’t know the power of God” – Matthew 22:29 (emphasis mine).

Those words were an eye-opener for me because I could surmise that atheists have the same problems too; they neither understand the scriptures nor know the power of God.

My second most favourite post for the year

Let me also use this medium to talk about my second most favourite post for the outgoing year. The post was inspired by my study of the book of Malachi in the course of 2019.

In the Two Antidotes To Divorce Hidden Away in Malachi, I talked about the fact God intends for our marriages to be a lifelong union. And that to prevent divorce, we must guard our hearts against it and be faithful to our spouses. That’s so simple yet many people miss it. How sad!

You can check out the two posts and let me know what you think.

Thank you.

Now That Christmas Is Over

You looked forward to Christmas all year long. Now the celebration for this year is over.

It will be another 360 something days before you will have another chance to celebrate it again. That is if you are still alive.

Please don’t get me wrong there. I’m not suggesting that you would die before next year’s Christmas. But I’m not denying that the possibility exists for all of us.

Come to think of it, not everyone who celebrated Christmas last year’s Christmas was around to join in this year’s celebration. And as sure as the as the rising sun tomorrow, not everyone who celebrated this year’s Christmas will be alive to celebrate the coming year’s.

You know I’m not being a prophet of doom here. It is the sad reality of the life we found ourselves in: after all said and done, death is inevitable.

The Bible says, “There’s time for everything under the Sun.”

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance… Ecclesiastes 3:1-11.

Let’s take further exploration of the first part of the above quote:

A time to be born, a time to die

Jesus had the time He was born to this earth. He had the time He had to die as well. Gratefully He had the time to resurrect as well.

If you are reading this now, I know you had the time you were born; you had a beginning. Or don’t you have a birthday?

And if you had a beginning on this earth, you are also going to have an ending. It is called death – the way of all mankind.

Unlike when you were born when everyone jubilated, when you die, people will cry. I mean if you are not Adolf Hitler or anyone else in his mould, I don’t see why anyone should be glad when you die.

But whether anyone is sad or happy when you die, it would not really matter to you. What would matter would be how you have used your short life on earth to prepare for the eternity that death would be the doorway to.

If you have prepared well for eternity, death will be a gain to you. But if you have not, death will be a great loss to you. Regrettably, it will be too late by then to make amends.

But how can you prepare well for eternity?

To be honest, the answer is simpler than you think. It requires simple faith in Jesus Christ, the birth of whom we just celebrated and will continue to celebrate in the years ahead.

Think back a little to the Christmas story: a virgin gave birth to Jesus Christ, the Saviour of the whole world. (See Matthew 1:20-21).

You see, that’s why we celebrate Christmas every year: a Saviour was born to save us from our sins. In this Saviour lies the hope of all humanity. But it is sad that many are not seeing it that way.

Now that Christmas is over, the question I would like to ask you is this: do you have a personal relationship by faith with the Celebrant? By that I mean, have you accepted Jesus to be your Lord and Saviour?

If your answer is yes, I will advise you to nurture that relationship so closely that nothing will come between you and Him. You have His assurance that nothing can separate you from His love till you will get to meet Him face to face on the other side of this life.

On the other hand, if you have not put your faith in Jesus Christ as your Lord and personal Saviour, you have between now and the next Christmas to do so. Actually, no one can guarantee that you will be alive till the next Christmas. So that means NOW is the best chance you have to invite Jesus into your life.

Please wait no further, “For God says, “At just the right time, I heard you. On the day of salvation, I helped you.” Indeed, the “right time” is now. Today is the day of salvation” 2 Corrinthians 6:2.


What do you say?

Beyond the Fanfare, What is Christmas About?

In many places around the world, people celebrate Christmas for various reasons. And the celebration is usually done with a lot of fanfare.

But beyond the fanfare with which it is celebrated, we must not lose sight of the fact that the essence of Christmas is Jesus Christ Himself. Without Jesus as the centre of focus, every celebration of Christmas is an empty celebration.

That brings us to the question:

Beyond the fanfare, what is Christmas about?

1. It is about the birth of a Saviour

Jesus was born to be the Saviour of the world. He was born with the grandest mission ever: To save us from our sins.

Before Jesus Christ was born to the earth, an Angel had said to Joseph about Mary, “She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins” Matthew 1:21.

His name Jesus literally means Saviour. In other words, his name encapsulates His mission.

He was born the Messiah, “the promised deliverer of the Jewish nation prophesied in the Hebrew Bible.”

But not just to His people alone, His saving grace extends to all mankind. “So that everyone who believes in him will have eternal life (John 3:15).

2. It is about the coming of divinity to earth.

One of the core doctrines in Christianity is the belief that Jesus Christ is God in the flesh. When Jesus was born, He brought divinity to humanity.

Jesus is also called Immauel, meaning God with us. The second person of the Trinity stepped into time and be born on earth as a baby.

The incarnation is that event where the second person of the Trinity, the Word, became flesh and dwelt among us – Matt Slick

And throughout His life on Earth, Jesus never suffered any identity crisis: He knew who He is: God in the flesh.

At one point in Jesus’ ministry, Philip, one of the twelve disciples of Jesus said to Him, “Lord, show us the Father and that will be enough for us.”

Jesus’ response to him was most unequivocal: “Don’t you know me, Philip, even after I have been among you such a long time? Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say, ‘Show us the Father’? John 14:8-9.

3. It is the birth of the soon-coming King

The birth of Jesus was His first coming to earth. His second coming is still a future event, but it is going to be a sure event.

His first birth by a virgin was foretold and it did happened as prophesied. There is no doubt in my mind that His second-coming which has also been prophesied, will sooner or later take place.

Why not under-estimating Christmas we should not lose sight of the fact that Jesus will come back again – not as a baby, but as a King.

At the ascension of Jesus, His disciples received an angelic assurance that the same way they saw their Master taken up in the clouds into Heaven is the same way He would come back to the earth.

“Men of Galilee,” said the two Angels who accosted the disciples, “why are you standing here staring into heaven? Jesus has been taken from you into heaven, but someday he will return from heaven in the same way you saw him go!” Acts 1: 11.

4. It is the birth of the One who will judge the world

Guess who will be the Judge of the world? Jesus! That’s right, Jesus will be the one to judge the people of the world.

“The Father judges no one, but has given all judgment to the Son” – John 5:22.

Here is how the Bible further paints the picture of the judgement:

When the Son of Man comes in his glory and all his angels are with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. The people of every nation will be gathered in front of him. He will separate them as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. He will put the sheep on his right but the goats on his left – Matthew 25:31-33.

For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may be recompensed for his deeds in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad – 2 Corrinthians 5:10.


When we celebrate Christmas, we should remember that we are not just celebrating the birth of an ordinary baby. We are celebrating the birth of our Saviour, God in the flesh, the soon-coming King and the future Judge of the world.

What do you say?

Some Advice To A Christian Lady Waiting For Mr. Right – Part 2

Where on earth is the man I am supposed to marry? I am tired of waiting and I don’t want to make a mistake. I am in my late 20’s slowly approaching 30 soon and would like to settle [down in marriage] within the next one year. My family is putting a lot of pressure on me and I am starting to crumble under the pressure of having to remain sane while waiting for my own [man].

That was from a christian sister expressing her frustrations over her desire to get married but which had not come through.

If you found yourself on this page without having read the first part of the post, please go and read it before you continue with this one. That way, you will have a solid background of the issue in discourse.

Right now, instead of worrying about hooking up with the right man, you concentrate on being the right lady and the right man will find you at the right time.

We will continue from where we stopped by looking at some more advice given to the sister in question by some concerned people. (Again, please read the part one of the post – if you haven’t done so. Thank you).

Let’s us take a look at more advice:

You have painted a picture of the kind of man you are waiting for: a God fearing Man… that’s good. Every woman wants the guy of their dreams to be ready made. But very few are willing to work to make the “man of their dreams.”

Some times, from in the midst of dirt comes true lasting diamonds… Jesus Christ promised a thief paradise at his death – not the best of his disciples, nor the perfect of men, but a “thief”.

Maybe your “man” would not come the way you expect. Just as the way the Israelites expected the Messiah to be born in the palace not in a manger… My dear be open-minded… good Christians are not born, they are made… the most devout of Christians most often times were not born Christians…

What I am saying is that you should keep an open mind and don’t restrict your heart to finding him in your church or among the young pastors in your Church…

God would bring not the best person for you, but the right person for you… please I would advise you [not to] take all relationship decisions to your pastor. Better talk to your parents than your pastor… just my advise o! I’m not saying your pastor is not good in such issues.

You would be fine… live and be happy… don’t let the pressure overwhelm you.

And this one really broke it down:

does it mean all the good men are already taken

Stop being too conservative; you said you’re an indoor person. If you keep staying indoors WHO would see you? Come out of the shell and let ‘’the product’’ be seen and heard.

Your appearance matters a lot – you need to look good 24/7 but in a generally accepted way. (Neither too holy looking nor too sinful looking). If you are fat – loose the weight. Most guys (like me) ABHORE FAT GIRLS as wife beacause they look lazy, dirty and sexually unattractive.

Your character too; carrying Bible and going to church everyday DOES NOT MEAN you are good natured. Even satan goes to church these days and calls himself ‘’pastor’’. BE SINCERELY GOOD NATURED. BE OPEN MINDED. BE SIMPLE NATURED.

When a joke is funny laugh – be yourself in a good mannered way. Let people see that you are humble. Be accommodating with ALL classes of people. When you come across ‘’drunkards, party freaks’’ and poor/ christian men, DON’T CARRY YOUR NOSE UP; their brother might just be Mr Perfect or Mr Perfect might just be watching you.

Be perfect in courtesy. Learn to greet anyone/everyone politely. Greeting alone has given thousands of girls husbands.

Be positive minded – imagine good things and smile and pray for them to come.

Let’s conclude  with this one who gave her own advice/suggestions by telling her experience with her own sister:

I have an elder sister who will be 30 years next year. She’s unmarried too, and she’s a good  christian but she’s very judgemental.

I say it without an iota of doubt that she’s been single this long because of her judgemental nature. And I have noticed that is one thing many self-acclaimed “good  christians” have in common.

So if before now you have maintained a self-righteous attitude, madam, I tell you today that you have a long way to go because no one will ever be good enough for you. Please, I will advise you to maintain your virtues as a woman, but embrace the quality of open mindedness.

Learn to relate with people and learn from them instead of judging them before they even come close. People will always have excesses. It’s not yours to write them off, but to live peaceably with all men as much as you can.

By becoming more  accommodating and open-minded concerning people, you will understand that we are all different because of our cultures, upbringing, orientation and even religious beliefs and this will help you have a better approach towards people and things.

However, do not mistake my post to mean that I am accusing you decisively of being judgemental or narrow minded. I’m just saying that if you are, please make an attempt to change; it could be holding you back more than you know. I am emphasizing this because I live with someone who is and I know how much it has affected her.

May God direct your path, I can’t say anything outside this because I’m just 21 yrs, very single and I don’t have too much I about all these marriage issues. I will also like to tell you to do something because you want to, not because of pressure [from other people]. That has helped me in a lot of my doings. I leave you with this. May God be your guide.


What would be your advice to a Christian lady waiting for the right man to marry? Let the conservation continue in the comment section.

Some Advice To A Christian Sister Waiting For Mr. Right – Part 1

does it mean all the good men are already taken

In 2013, a Nigerian Christian lady published an online post on the frustrations she was facing waiting for the right man to get married to. According to her, she was under immense pressure from her family to get married.

The good part was that she was ready to get married and two she knew the kind of husband she wanted: a godly man who is filled with the word of God, a lover of God and a man fit to be a minister of the gospel.

But the bad part was that such a man was not forth coming her way (yet). And she was getting tired waiting…

“Where on earth is this man?” she had asked in utter frustration. “And does it mean all the good men are already taken?”

Let’s take a deeper peep into her situation as she narrated in her own words:

I never thought I’d be the lady staying calm and waiting almost endlessly for the one I would spend the rest of my life with; the one who would one day become my husband and the father of my children, my best friend and love.

I am a christian and have noticed that I have a thing for Christian men who are filled with the word of God. Needless to say that I would eventually be getting into ministry in my older years, and every prophetic word I have heard about my marriage has pointed to the fact that the man God has prepared for me would also most likely be in ministry and a huge God lover.

Now the thing is where on earth is this man? I am tired of waiting and I don’t want to make a mistake.

I am in my late 20’s slowly approaching 30 soon and would like to settle [down in marriage] within the next one year.

My family is putting a lot of pressure on me and I am starting to crumble under the pressure of having to remain sane while waiting for my own [man].

I have indeed met a lot of other men who I dare not settle with. eg party rockers, drinkers, womanizers and the rest. Does it mean that all the good men are taken?

Aside waiting, I also want to feel loved, wanted and appreciated. I want him so much already.

I am a professional lady, I am yoruba, I am gentle, kind hearted and want to continue serving God. What can I do to remain calm? (Source: Nairaland )


I felt touched by the sister’s post, hence I decided to offer my two cents in response. (Bear in mind this was way back in 2013).

You sound like a decent girl, so I would say there is no need to become desperate…. And don’t let anyone, family members inclusive, unduly pressure you into Marriage. The danger in that is that you might end up with the wrong guy.

Bear in mind that 28 is not too old [to get married]. I understand your anxiety but be careful not to descend into desperation….

Right now, instead of worrying about hooking up with the right man, you concentrate on being the right lady and the right man will find you at the right time.

Trust in God to give you the right man. In the midst of wolves parading as men, God knows the right man for the right woman.

Be convinced that God loves you enough to give you the best husband. There are still some good men, husband material, out there, looking for someone like you.

But like they say, if you don’t define, you won’t find. So Please take time to list out the things you want in your husband. Everyday, look at the list, be positive about it; envision him come to you. It may sound funny but it works.

With that frame of mind, you can now pray: Oh Lord, wherever my husband is, let him locate me. Bring him to me or take me to where he is so we can meet each other.

It worked for me that way. And today, my wife and I are happily married. You will soon testify too.


As you would rightly expect, there was a barrage of other advice or suggestions in response to that post. Some of them are not worth your time, so I won’t bother to share them here.

However, there were some I considered very useful, and I will share a few of them here with the hope that someone in similar situation may learn from it.

Check out this one first:

woman praying

I understand your frustration and exhaustive patience. However, He makes all things beautiful in His time and not our time. A lot of single ladies have made terrible and life threatening mistakes because of impatience.

While waiting for the right man, keep adding values to yourself, study good and bad marriages to learn how a home should be, read books and enjoy your singlehood to the maximum in a godly way.

“The vision may tarry, wait for it, it shall speak…” You need to exercise patience and trust God with all your heart. Need I add that this is the time you should draw closer to God – not for what He can give but pleasing and doing His will.

So my sister, do not let your age or pressure from any source push you to do what is not right. Do not mind people talking about you closing in to 30. I wonder the importance of the age if one lives a useless life.

And this one:

…All I can say is that He is preparing you for the task ahead in your ministry and in your home. See this waiting period as an opportunity for you to develop yourself spiritually as it would come in handy when you get married. You will agree with me that staying married is more important than getting married.

And then this:

You are just 28 so its not yet time to press the panic button and please do not let anyone pressure you yet. You say you love Christian men so at least you know what you want. So the question is where are you likely to get Christian men?

Church is the simple answer! Again not all men in Church are Christians but I believe you have the Spirit of God and you will be able to tell the difference.

I also encourage you to get more involved in Church activities, Bible study, mid-week service, become a worker and put yourself in a position where you will meet Christian men. Again be careful because lots of bad boys are in church these days; but you have the Spirit of God in you and you will know the difference.

I can even suggest you try to get close to your Pastor or his wife. Lots of Pastors actually do hook-ups with Church members these days and if your pastor is nice, he could hook you up with a nice gentleman in church.

Again, tell your friends and their husbands too that they could hook you up with their friends or cousins etc. You just can’t stay at home and expect Mr. Right to come around. Some people don’t like hook-ups but I see nothing wrong in it.

Lastly you say you are a professional, do you have friends where you work? Try to be accommodating more and go for Christmas parties and office parties, you could meet someone there as well.

But please make sure you know what you want in a man because there are devils out there who are just waiting to prey on young innocent girls like you so be careful. You are a Christian and remember the virtues of Christianity. God help you.


What would be your own advice to the lady in question?

On You, Stress And Trust In God

Stress and trust

Have you ever had that feeling of being emotionally overloaded and you are struggling to cope with demands of life? If your answer is yes, I’m afraid you might be experiencing what is called “stress.”

And if you are experiencing stress, what is the implication to you? I mean what does your stress level reveal to you if you are a believer in Jesus Christ?

Generally speaking, what do you understand by the word ‘stress’?

“Stress is a feeling of emotional or physical tension. It can come from any event or thought that makes you feel frustrated, angry, or nervous. Stress is your body’s reaction to a challenge or demand. In short bursts, stress can be positive, such as when it helps you avoid danger or meet a deadline” (MedlinePlus).

If stress can be positive, it means there is negative stress as well. According to those who should know, “Stress becomes negative when a person faces continuous challenges without relief or relaxation between stressors. As a result, the person becomes overworked, and stress-related tension builds.”

As a believer in Christ, beyond the common understanding of stress as a ” feeling of emotional or physical tension,” you should also note that stress has some far-reaching implications for you; it reveals your spiritual condition (the centre of your focus) at the point you are being stressed.

So what does stress reveal about you?

How stress affects your trust in God
Drs. Dennis & Jennifer Clark with Dr. Sid Roth (Source: Youtube)

In an episode of Sid Roth’s It’s Supernatural on youtube, I watched the host interview Drs. Dennis and Jennifer Clark. The couple are pastors in ministry and are involved in helping people overcome toxic emotional feelings and setting them free from emotional bondage, no matter how long those negative feelings have been held.

Towards the middle of that interview, Dr. Roth asked the following question, “Doctors tell us that stress is really bad; it causes lots of problems. What do do you say?”

Dr. Dennis Clark’s response to that question was really an eye-opener for me. That’s why I’m sharing it with you here, with the hope that it benefits you too:

“I say stress can be a friend. It can tell you that Jesus isn’t ruling at that point in time. By definition, stress means you’re emotionally controlled by people or circumstances. And you cannot be stressed and trust God at the same time. It’s a physiological and spiritual impossibility.”

I was like wow; this is fantastic! I never saw stress in that light before. Did you see what I meant when I said it was an eye-opener?

Now let’s break it down further:

1. Stress can be your friend as a believer in Christ. In other words, it lets you know that Jesus is not ruling in your heart at that time; you are not walking in the spirit or you have (temporarily) shifted your heart away from God.

2. Stress means that you are emotionally being controlled by people or circumstances. In other words, you are not the one in control of the situations in your life. And if you are not in control, something or someone is controlling you (and it’s not God!). What is that thing or who is that person controlling you?

3. You can not be stressed and trust God at the same time. According to Dr Clark, it is not physiologically and spiritually possible to do so. So it means that as a believer, the more you are stressed the more you will found it difficult to trust God.

***

I believe you have seen a fresh perspective of what stress reveals about you as a believer in Christ: If you are stressed, it means you are not trusting God. I hope you will take appropriate measures to refocus your heart and your trust.

Thank you for reading and what do you think?

The Implication Of Worrying (As A Believer In Christ)

Why do christians worry?

What does it mean to worry?

It means to “feel or cause to feel anxious or troubled about actual or potential problems.” So when you worry, it means you are in a state of anxiety and trouble “over actual or potential problems.”

Broadly speaking, “Worry refers to the thoughts, images, emotions, and actions of a negative nature in a repetitive, uncontrollable manner that results from a proactive cognitive risk analysis made to avoid or solve anticipated potential threats and their potential consequences” (Wikipedia).

As a believer in Christ, you know you are not supposed to worry so much. But you worry all the same. Why?

You worry to the point that stress overwhelms you, emotionally or otherwise. That’s not the situation you should put yourself in.

Jesus said in Matthew chapter 6 (NLT):

25 “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? … 27 Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? …

31 “So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ 32 These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. 33 Seek the Kingdom of God[e] above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.

34 “So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.

Lack of faith

As Jesus said we should not worry, it means it is within our control not to worry. So that tells me you are not speaking the truth if you say, “I can’t help worrying.”

Of course you can help it if you make up your mind to do so. Worrying does not grip you without your consent.

You play an active role whenever you are worrying, How? By being actively involved in a pattern of negative thinking over real or imagined situations.

As a believer in Christ, can you deal with worrying? I would say yes! If you can refocus, you can deal with it. But a lot will depend on your answer to the following question:

What’s Your Priority?

Before Jesus said we should not worry about tomorrow, He emphasized the need for us to make seeking the Kingdom of God the greatest priority of our lives. In His words:

Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. Matthew 6:33, NLT

As believers in Christ, seeking the Kingdom of God should be our main focus – our priority. The purpose of doing that is to enable us embed our trust in God and not on the daily pursuits of life.

The truth is that if the daily pursuits of life become your main focus and topmost priority (at the expense of kingdom focus) worrying will become a natural consequence.

The Implication

When you worry, it should be a sign to you that you have shifted your focus from God to other things. And worrying has its consequences; it causes emotional stress, even physical ailments.

So let your mind’s main focus be on God and your worries will be a lot less. As Prophet Isaiah says, God keeps you in perfect peace (worry-free) if your mind is stayed on Him (Isaiah 26:3).

What do you think?

International Men’s Day: What For?

Every one of us have men in our lives. We have them as our fathers, husbands, brothers, uncles, cousins, pastors, colleagues, friends, neighbours, employers, employees, doctors, to name but a few.

These people influence our lives and positively impact the society as well. Sometimes we celebrate them (like on father’s day), sometimes we don’t. But each one of us should have at least one reason to celebrate the men in our lives.

What for? The work hard to make our lives and society better. They provide leadership, provision, protection and so on so forth for us.

I’m not suggesting that men should become the object of our collective worship. But I’m saying there is nothing wrong with celebrating men for their immense contribution to the well-being of the society.

Today is that day set aside around the world for such celebration; every year, the 19th day of November is observed as International Men’s Day (IMD). And by extension, November is sometimes referred to as International Men’s month.

Now, the question is, “What is the purpose of having an International Men’s Day?” It is generally understood as an “occasion to celebrate boys and men’s achievements and contributions, in particular for their contributions to community, family, marriage, and child care. The broader and ultimate aim of the event is to promote basic humanitarian values” (Wikipedia).

Did you notice that boys were included alongside men to be celebrated? That is to say, it is a day earmarked to celebrate the male gender’s contribution to society. (Sorry ladies, you can wait till the 20th day of the month of March when the next International Women’s Day will be celebrated).

Objectives of international men's day

In pursuing the objective of celebrating men’s and boy’s positive contribution to society, special focus is made on some specific areas of boy’s and men’s lives. These are encapsulated in what is referred to as:

The 6 Pillars of International Men’s Day

According to the IMD’s website, the objectives of the International Men’s Day are as listed below:

  1. To promote positive male role models; not just movie stars and sports men but every day, working class men who are living decent, honest lives.
  2. To celebrate men’s positive contributions to society, community, family, marriage, child care, and to the environment.
  3. To focus on men’s health and well-being; social, emotional, physical and spiritual.
  4. To highlight discrimination against men; in areas of social services, social attitudes and expectations, and law.
  5. To improve gender relations and promote gender equality
  6. To create a safer, better world; where people can be safe and grow to reach their full potential.

These are noble objectives you might say. But to which extent are they being achieved? That’s a question for another day!

Meanwhile, if you are a male reading this, don’t just read and walk away indifferently. I would like you to take another look at the six objectives listed above as a form of self evaluation to enable you identify areas for possible personal improvement.

If you are like me, we know we have not been the best we could be or did the best we could do in those stated cardinal areas. That’s to say, there is still room for improvement for all of us boys and men.

On the other hand, if you are a non-male, you may also want to evaluate the six objectives to identify the ones that appeal to you most. You can then help the men and boys around you improve in those areas of their lives or simply suggest to them as specific areas of improvement.

Happy International Men’s Day!

Let the conversation continue in the comment section.

Perfect Love – A Book Review

Books by Ufuomaee

Recall that when I posted my review of Ufuomaee’s The House Girl, I promised you that I would also read and review some other books by the same author. This post will be my fulfillment of that promise and I am glad to do it pro bono.

Some months have passed since I’ve completed reading the Perfect Love from cover to cover. I know I should have done the review earlier than now but after several weeks of doing the reviewing in my head, I have decided to put pen to paper. So please spare me some minutes from your precious time as I share my thoughts about the book.

About the book

Perfect Love is about the travails of Onome who has been unhappily married to her husband Temi for six years. Just before their sixth wedding anniversary, Onome meets her ex-boy friend and this turns her world upside down and she became “…a wandering heart. A restless heart. A troubled heart.”

Did Onome fall into the temptations that ensued? Did her husband find out about the other man? Was their marriage consumed by the lack of love and commitment in the relationship? Was she as committed to the marriage as she was to her writing career? It will be worth your time to find out the answers to these questions and more by reading the book.

Ufuoma Emerhor-Ashogbon
Ufuoma, Author of Perfect Love

The book is written by the brainy Ofuomaee, blogger at Grace & Truth, social entrepreneur and author of multiple christian fiction books. In the Perfect Love, the author continues in her now well established style of teaching valuable christian-living lessons via fictional stories that readers find largely believable and relatable.

The only departure from the author’s usual style is that instead of her being the one telling the stories and unfolding the narratives, she allowed each character in the book to do so by themselves. In a way, that also gives the reader a special experience while devouring the book.

The journaling style the author employed in writing the book gave me a breath of fresh air while reading it – a different style of presentation from anything I’ve read recently. As I noted earlier, the author allowed the characters to tell their stories by themselves and in their own words – what they did, could have done, thought about etc.

My worst and favourite character

If I were to pick out my worst character in Perfect Love, it would have to be no other person than Onome herself. Granted that she was very a brilliant and likable person, she continued to make choices that left much to be desired.

It was very annoying to me that she professed to be a born again Christian but had little or no commitment to living up to that sublime identity. And this contributed to her being entangled in the avoidable web of marital frustrations and unhappiness that she was enmeshed in.

My take is that she was, to a greater part, the architect of her own marital misfortunes. In one moment of reflection, she hit the nail on the head when she admitted, “I think our foundation was all wrong, we’d never taken the time to correct it. Yes, we both believed in God [but] He wasn’t Lord of our hearts, our marriage [and] our home.”

Most of the things she went through could have been avoided had she been truly committed to her profession of being a child of God. But then I have realised that, in many ways, Onome is not different from many of us who claim to be christians; we acknowledged God as our Saviour but we hardly let Him be the Lord of our lives.

And we claim we know God but we live our lives like we don’t know Him. What ever happened to the injunction of Jesus to us in Matthew 5:16,

“… let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.”?

Enough of Onome’s spiritual and emotional immaturity! I believe we all have some serious soul-searching to do. The earlier we get started the better.

If we must claim to have a relationship with God, let it show in our words and in our actions. Otherwise, we will not be able to escape the consequences of a hypocritical lifestyle.

On the other hand, I would pick the marriage counselor as my favorite character in the book. Her uncommon wisdom, christian maturity and honour shined through her counselling room. I saw her as a good ambassador of God and her profession.

I would assure you that you would pick one or two wisdom from the lips of that impressive marriage counselor when you read the book. As she says in one instant, “When you change your priories and give more time to things that matter, your life will be better for it.”

And who doesn’t want a better life?

Conclusions

I think Ufuomaee did a great job in the Perfect Love, addressing such familiar but important issues as communication in marriage, dealing with infidelity, divorce, marriage counselling, forgiveness, and so on. Although the book centres mainly on marriage and family affairs, I have no doubt that both married and unmarried people will find it helpful.

I definitely had my moments of both sobriety and thrill as I rummaged the pages of Perfect Love. And I believe I have many reasons to thank Ufuomaee for yet another good contribution to the genre of christian fiction.

Thank you for reading!

You can share your own thoughts in the comment section.

Applying Future Review Questions To Someone You Just Met (and Want a Relationship With)

Victor Uyanwanne

Let’s assume you know where you are going, or what you want in life. That’s great and commendable on your part because many people you will find around you have not yet figured that out.

If you happen to meet someone like that whom you are interested in or whom who desire a relationship with, but you are not sure exactly where they are in their lives or what they want in future, one way you can find out is to ask them the right questions. With the right questions about their future plans, you will be able to gain an insight into the kind of  future such people envisage for themselves.

That brings us to the point where we can talk about what is known as future review questions.

Future review questions are the questions you ask so “you can help other people (and yourself) to clarify what’s important for their future” (R. J Adams). For instance, “How do you see yourself in the next five years” is a future review question.

Future review questions help people to describe a preferred future; help them to paint a “portrait of their life as they desire it to be.” It is about articulating the things that are important to you, without which you would not consider life to be satisfying.

It makes sense to find out where your would-be ‘relationship partner’ stand on this. Right? Continue reading…

The Possible Scenarios

There are at least three possibilities that will unfold once you begin to ask future review questions to someone you just met and with whom you are interested in establishing a warm relationship with:

  1. He or she will be willing and is able to respond to your questions by clearly painting the portrait of the future that he or she desires. In other words, he or she will readily answer your future review questions;
  • He or she is willing but unable to clearly describe the kind of the future he or she desires. In other words, he or she has some difficulties answering your future review questions;
  • He or she is not willing to go into that kind of discussion with you. In other words, he or she refuses to answer your future review questions.

What ever response you might get from any of the three situations described above will give you a huge insight into the kind of person you are dealing with and how to further relate with him or her going forward. Please stay with me, you will find some useful hints on how to go about it.

Further Explanations

In his online book, How To Find A Good Christian Wife, And Keep Her, R. J. Adams gives us a detailed explanation or suggestions on how to handle any of those three scenarios. Although his explanations were given chiefly in the context of a single man seeking for relationship with a woman, I believe the underlining principles could also be applied to other forms of mutually beneficial relationships of interest to you.

Please hear him:

With those people who readily answer your question, you will likely have an interesting conversation about what is most important to them and what would make them satisfied. In those cases where you can add something to their preferred future, or where you can help them achieve their desired results, you have the basis for a long and satisfying friendship or relationship. In cases where you cannot help them, perhaps you can recommend a resource who can.

With people who have difficulty answering your future review question, help them by asking a series of smaller questions. Help them articulate the things that are important to them. Ask what they would like to do, where they would like to go, what they would like to have. Ask how they would prefer spending their time, what kind of people they want to be with, and so on. This can be a very creative and stimulating discussion.

…One of the greatest services you can perform for these people is to coach them to think through and talk about their desired outcomes. And, here again, if you can help make their future come true for them, you have just established the foundation for a great relationship.

What about the people who refuse to answer your future review question? Their unwillingness to answer likely means one of two things. First, their commitment may be to the past, not the future. They may not have thought about their future as something where they have any influence.

Secondly, their unwillingness to share their desired future with you may indicate a lack of trust. In either case, you have no basis for a relationship. Some people don’t have the courage or desire to dream, or they don’t trust you enough to share their thoughts with you. Don’t waste your time. Move on to someone else…”
(emphasis mine).

***

What do you think?

7 Simple Ways Of Dealing With Your Spouse’s Imperfections

“No body is perfect,” goes the popular saying. The truth of that statement is particularly obvious in a committed marital union between a man and woman.

Except you want to deceive yourself, you will gladly own up to the fact that the person you married is not a spotless angel. But this is no time to begin pointing accusing fingers at your spouse as the one with the most imperfections, because as you know, you yourself are not without some blemishes.

In other words, you often fall below each other’s expectations. Despite these imperfections, both of you can still be at peace with each other and hopefully be happier too.

If that is part of your marital goal, then you will allow me to proffer a few suggestions that will be helpful to you in that respect:

Here are seven simple ways you can deal with the imperfections of your spouse:

1. Accept that your spouse is not perfect

Your spouse is not an angel, so don’t expect that he or she will not make mistakes sometimes. And when that happens, please do show some understanding.

Truth be told, neither you nor your spouse is perfect. Perhaps you should let this guide your expectations so that you suffer less frustrations when your spouse’s behaviour falls below your esteemed expectations.

2. Be patient with your spouse

If you have come to terms with the fact that your spouse is not perfect and you are committed to loving him or her despite that, I am going to add that you should be patient with him or her.

I will not promise you that your spouse will grow into a faultless angel someday. But I can at least opine that if he or she is committed to your marriage as you are, there will be remarkable positive change of behaviour over time when you exercise the due patience with.

person sitting in front of table with plant

3. Maintain your sanity

Your spouse will ‘lose it’ sometimes and when that happens be sure to keep your own sanity and be at your best behaviours. Things will go downhill in your marriage if both of you decide to vent and and get mad at each other at the same time.

A wise spouse once told the better-half, “If you spit fire, I will vomit water.” The point here is, you and your spouse should not be spitting fire at the same time.

4. Talk things over with your spouse

In as much as I want you to cut some slack for your spouse, there will be times when it is important you talk things over with him or her. But you have to be gentle and nice over it, else you might trigger a volcanic eruption in the process.

In talking things over with your spouse, be humble, loving and considerate. Resist the temptation of pointing accusing fingers at each other.  Instead of looking for who is wrong, focus on what is wrong and deal with it.

If your spouse raises his or voice in the process, keep yours low. Apologise where necessary and accept responsibility as appropriate.

Engage in the conversation in such a away that it strengthens your marriage and not in a way that tears it apart.

5. Avoid the silent treatment

There are times silence may be golden, but at times too, it can be a time-bomb waiting to explode. I trust that you know the difference. While it is not okay to shout at your spouse, on the other hand, don’t use the silent treatment as a tool for affliction in marriage.

It is good to keep silent sometimes in order not to offend in words or as part of your anger management strategy. But if your spouse desires commmunication with you, do not give him or her the silent treatment to punish him or her for what they did to you.

6. Celebrate your spouse’s strength

Despite your spouse’s so-called imperfections, he or she must have some strengths as well. Identify those strengths and celebrate them.

I am totally convinced that your spouse is not a good-for-nothing fellow, otherwise you would not have married him or her. So I am telling you for free that you can manage your spouse’s imperfections better by focusing on his or her strengths and celebrating them.

Compliment your spouse’s good behaviours and be less critical of the bad ones. It is not easy to do, but it is worth the try.

woman praying beside tree

7. Pray regularly for your spouse

It is not enough for you to talk to your spouse. You should also talk to God about spouse – not in form of endless bitter complaints but in form of regular loving prayers.

Trying to force a change in behaviour on your spouse may be counter-productive. But when you pray, you invite God to handle the situation in the best possible way.

Don’t say you don’t know what to pray about concerning your spouse. Are there things you like about your spouse? I believe the answer is yes. Begin your prayers by thanking God for those things.

Also, the things that annoy you about him or her should be part of the things you should pray about. Your dreams for her, the things she cares about, her personal goals are some of the things you can pray for your wife about.

***

You have read my views. Let’s hear yours in the comment section.


©Copyright 2019 | Victor Uyanwanne

Still Depending On Rain Water For Survival

Photo source: PlumbingAfrica.co.za

I have since realised that there were unique experiences we had as kids who grew up in the villages that our counterparts in a city such as Lagos may not relate to. A little of that sentiment of mine was tickled this morning when my seven year old son asked me a simple question:

“Daddy, why do some people put out buckets, bowls and other containers when it rains?”

“To collect some rain water for use,” I replied rather too flippantly, without even looking at the direction where the question came from. But then, almost immediately the salient reality of that question began to dawn on me.

The answer I gave should have been pretty obvious to him you might think. But please give the boy a break; even if for no other reason but because collecting rain water for household use has never been part of his experience in his few years of life on earth.

With portable water now being pumped to the kitchen, bathroom and wherever else water is needed in the house, how would he appreciate the fact that many people around my country still depend on rain water for survival?

“For what kind of use, daddy?” he sought to clarify.

“My dear, it’s for domestic use.” This time I had to look at him in the face, with my hands on each of his shoulders, leaning forward in the process.

When I was at his age (more than three decades ago), I didn’t have to wonder why people harvested rain water. The experience was too common-place for me not to have known the purpose.

But his question afforded me a genuine coachable moment to point out the fact that many homes still cannot do without relying on rain water for some of – if not for all – their domestic uses. I guess that’s still part of the reality of living in a developing nation.

I went on to explain to him how we used to depend on rain water as the main source of water supply way back in the village where I was born. Just like everyone else in that small community, my mum and my older siblings would put out different sizes of containers to collect rain water whenever it poured.

Even the roof of the houses there were embedded with water conveyance systems. That way, the abundant rain water that hits atop the covering corrugated iron sheets were channeled through well-constructed gutters linked with vertical trunk pipes that emptied directly into underground concrete tanks or into big volume surface water reservoirs.

The water so-collected would then be fetched out and put to daily use (washing, bathing, cooking, cleaning and yes, drinking) all-year round. The process was reliable and sustainable too. And because of the beautiful natural vegetation surrounding the environment we lived in, coupled with the absence of fossil fuel using factories, the problem of acid rain was non-existent.

You see, people like my son who were born in an urban city would never fully understand that kind of experience which we considered common-place while growing up. And I completely understand!

Photo Source: Kanchan Nepal

Perhaps a little walk back memory lane will underscore my point. I was born in a village in the present day Delta State, Nigeria. I grew up there till my teen years before I finally relocated to the city of Lagos.

That little village was blessed with a few amenities that made it standout amidst other ones around it. It had a well-tarred Trunk B road that ran through it from one end to another connecting it directly to the State Capital at the far end, separated only by a few other villages and towns.

At that time telephone service was a huge luxury way beyond the reach of 99.9999% of the population. Even at that, the village was already linked to the national telephone backbone. And apart from the availability of analogue phone service powered by the now defunct NITEL (Nigeria Telecommunications), the village also had electricity supply from the national grid.

However, water supply was the biggest problem we had to grapple with in that village. No streams, no boreholes and no portable water supply from anywhere. Only rain water, which was abundant doing the wet season and scanty in the dry season, was available.

Thanks to a failed pipe-borne water project sponsored by the then military state government, the various households in the village never had the privilege of regular supply of treated water pumped to them. Looking back now, I would say that was my first experience of a failed government project being commissioned as successfully completed.

Whether it was the contractor’s gross incompetence or the systemic corruption in high places that robbed the community of a properly executed portable water facility, my young mind could not have comprehended it then. But now the picture is clearer.

That was how the pictured looked like some three decades ago. Unfortunately, that’s the same story (or even worse) that could be told of many vital but abandoned (water) projects across many states of the Federation today.

Could the experience have been better for the masses, especially with respect to water supply? You tell me what you think!

3 Ways You Can Capture Coachable Moments With Your Kids

Parenting

As a parent, how much do you even realise that you are your children’s number one life coach? When it comes to coaching your kids, do not underestimate your role as a parent, and please do not be lazy playing that role in your children’s lives.

You may assume that your kids will know some things on their own, but then you get to find out they don’t. You may also assume that they should be taught everything in school, but at last you get to discover they weren’t. That means there is a learning gap between what they are supposed to know and what they actually do know.

In what little ways can you bridge that gap with your kids in a way that engenders good rapport between you and them? Of course, there might be many ways to that end. But in this post, I will suggest capturing the coachable moments with them.

Coachable or teachable moments’ refer to those unplanned or informal opportunities for you as a parent to have conversations with your kids or wards with the aim of helping them to solve problems or learn a good lesson they could use in life. It is about impacting valuable lessons to your kids while life is at play.

Here are 3 ways you capture the coachable moments with your kids

1. Don’t be an absentee parent

One good advice I can give you as a parent is this: be there for your kids. And I know being there for your kids can take many forms. For instance, it can be about providing for them or paying their school fees. Any average parent would score high on those.

But how about being physically available for them as their life coauch? Certainly life will throw up coachable moments, but if you are not there for them, how can you take up that little responsibitlity?

2. Look out for coachable moments

When you are there for your kids, you will often find some coachable moments to explore. They abound in  your everyday relationship or activities with them. Train your eyes (and your other senses) to recognise coachable moments with your kids and you will surely find some.

Whether you are at the dining table with them,or watching television together or you are driving them to school, always look out for coachable moments. If you are not looking for, you may pass the opportunities when they present themselves.

3. Utilise the coachable moments

When life hands you a coachable moment with your kids, please don’t flunk it. The coachable moment may come in two ways: an opportunity for you to reinforce an observed positive behaviour or correct a bad behaviour.

In either case, utilising the coachable moments enables you as parent mould your kids or wards into better version of themselves.

***

As a parent, if you are there for your kids or wards, life will definitely hand you some coachable moments. Look out for such moments in your every day activities with your kids. And when you do find them, take advantage of those moments and impart lessons that will help your kids or wards become better versions of themselves


Have you had any coachable moments with your kids? Please share your experience in the comment section.

Is The Bible Creating Atheists?

How are atheists made? Does the Bible contribute in creating atheists? Instead of revealing God to us, is the Bible now taking people away from God?

I asked those questions not because I don’t believe in the Bible anymore, neither is it because I do not know the purpose of the Bible. But because I want to frontally address a wrong notion a reader has about the Bible and atheism.

One atheist who commented on one of my posts has alleged that “the Bible is the best book for creating atheists.” I would not let that pass just like that because it’s possible there are some other people with that same kind of erroneous thinking.

First and foremost, any Christian worth the name will not dispute the divine inspiration of the Bible, neither will he or she agree with the suggestion that the Bible creates atheists. But in the interest of those who may not be so grounded, further examination may be necessary.

To examine the claim that the Bible is the best book for creating atheists, we would just take a quick look at what purpose the Bible serves.

In his second letter to Timothy, apostle Paul categorically stated the inspiration behind, and the purpose of, the (Bible) Scriptures:

All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for instruction, for conviction, for correction, and for training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be complete, fully equipped for every good work (2 Timothy 3:16-17).

From that verse, we can see that the Bible scripture was inspired by God and is “profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness” and “to equip us for every good work.”

Purpose of the Bible

As one source puts it, “The Bible is great literature and the all-time number-one best-seller. It contains history, entertaining stories, poetry, philosophy, and personal letters. But, more than that, the Bible is God’s Word. If we have to speak of a single purpose of the Bible, it would be to reveal God to us. There are many things that we could never know about God unless He told them to us. The Bible is God’s self-revelation to humanity. The Bible also tells us who we are. It tells us of our sin and of God’s plan of salvation in Jesus Christ.”

Despite the reality described above, there are people who have a complete misunderstanding of what the Bible is about. And that’s rather unfortunate.

Recently on this blog, I had an extended interaction with an atheist who read and commented on one of my posts. At some point during the online conversation, the atheist made the following comment about the Bible and God:

The bible has numerous books filled with violence and much of this violence is by your god. It sounds like he has no idea how to be a god of peace. Doesn’t he have an anger management problem, if he exists? No wonder that the bible is the best book for creating atheists. You need to read it properly.

My response to him went as follows:

If you believe that God has an anger issue, it means you are admitting that He exists in the first place. When you are honest about that, we can begin to explore the nature of God, which obviously you have misunderstood. Your claim about the Bible being a book for creating atheists is malicious. You know it’s not true. You became an atheist by your choice… so stop blaming it on the Bible.

Conclusions

I don’t know what everyone else think. But in my own opinion, the Bible is not a book for creating atheists. So it could not have been the best book for doing so as claimed by that reader.

Anyone that chooses to become an atheist, does so out of his or her own volition. So it will be wrong to blame it on the Bible.

The Bible is a book about God and His people. It tells the story of man from creation till when the world will end and beyond. It is a book for conviction, instruction, correction in righteousness and it prepares us for good works.

The Bible serves to bring us closer to God; not to take us away from Him. To that effect, anyone who claims to have read the Bible back to back without discovering God in it has either read a different Bible or has read it with the wrong mindset.

What do you think say?

Imagine An Atheist Calling Me An Atheist

Any follower of this blog would already know that I believe in God. That fact has never been hidden in any way.

I would add that I do not just believe in God in the general sense of it, I believe in Him in the sense of having a personal relationship with Him through faith in His Son Jesus Christ whom I have willingly accepted as my Lord and personal Saviour.

On this blog I have written sufficient number of posts to have made it clear enough that I don’t belong to atheists’ camp. So you can imagine my surprise when one of my readers (ostensibly a first-timer) suggested in one of his comments to the post The Problems with Atheists that I could be an “atheist masquerading as a Protestant Fundamentalist.”

In the referenced post, I had pointed out that:

Atheists do not have what it takes to come to the conclusion that God does not exist. So when you have anyone claiming God does not exist, understand that he or she is either being insincere or is displaying his or her ignorance. Or as the Bible puts it, he or she is simply being foolish.

Just like the Sadducees that accosted Jesus over a question on resurrection, whereas they didn’t believe in resurrection, the problem with atheists who go about discrediting God and the notion of His existence is that they neither know the Scriptures nor the power of God.”

Though not unexpected, there were many backlashes from atheists over that post. Sad to say, many of the comments from them went off course. One of such comments was what inspired the title of this present post:

Are you a Catholic? Do you accept the teaching of the church? Isn’t it the church that interprets the bible? Or are you really an atheist who is masquerading under the mask of Protestant Fundamentalism?

If you’re a Fundamentalist, the former Fundamentalist pastor (now atheist) called Bruce Gerencser will chop your arguments up and make mince meat of them. He doesn’t hate God. He just doesn’t believe that God exists. What he hates is Fundamentalists pontificating on God and Fundamentalists misrepresenting atheists.

You guys, both Catholics and Protestants, are suffering from what Richard Dawkins calls “The God delusion”.

Although the comment was full of rabbit trails, I cut to the chase in the response I gave to it:

I’m not a Catholic, neither am I Protestant fundamentalist, as you put it. And your suggestion that I could be an atheist is even more laughable. How could I be so foolish to be an atheist? I know better!

For the avoidance of doubts, I am a disciple of Jesus Christ who believes in God as the creator of all things, who has accepted the saving grace that is available in Christ Jesus alone for the forgiveness of my sin and I’m living my life to please God.

I understand what the Bible says, “only fools say God doesn’t exist.” So between those of us who believe that God exists and those [of you] that don’t believe, we know who is delusioned.

Dawkins’ book is seriously mistaken in the claim that there is no God. From the reviews I have read, I know the book is an attack on God and Christianity. Anger. Hatred.

It is okay to note that the God he claims doesn’t exist, makes him so angry. That’s the same trait I have seen in many atheists I have interacted with.

no one can convince you there is God

Talking about the atheists I have had online conversations with in the past, many of them (if not all of them) would also call us delusionists for believing that God exists. Recently, I had to quip to one of them:

“If those of us who believe in God are delusionists, then those [of you] who don’t believe in Him must be worse off because atheism does not make sense at all.”

That response may appear harsh to some people, but that was as nice I could be. I believe the irony in it is clear enough for everyone to understand.

For emphasis sake, I am not an atheist. And I don’t want to be one. I believe that God exists and I believe in His Son Jesus Christ as my Lord and personal Saviour.

Atheism does not make sense to me at all. It’s all foolishness parading as knowledge. “”The fool says in his heart, “There is no God”” Psalms 14:1. I stand on that Biblical position.

All the same, I thank God for His mercies that are seeing some atheists come to Christ. How I wish these ones here will one day see their folly and also come to Christ before it becomes too late for them.

Thank you for reading. Your views are welcome.

Dear Parents, Forgive Your Erring Children

The account of the ever popular story of the prodigal son in the Bible is one of the greatest stories of forgiveness ever written. Jesus told the story to demonstrate the unconditional love of God for us mankind.

No matter how much we think we have erred against God, He will always forgive and accept us if we come back home to Him. As Jesus Himself assured us, “…he that comes to me, I will in no wise cast out” (John 6:37).

As parents, can we learn and apply that principle in the way we treat our erring children? I will like to answer ‘yes’ to that question.

The prodigal son’s father forgave his betrayal, disloyalty, rebellion, foolishness, greed, recklessness, haughtiness, impatience and extravagance. There is no reason we should not extend same kind of forgiveness to our erring children – irrespective of the offences they have committed, or will ever commit against us.

We do not easily give up on those we love – whatever they do to us. And we love our children. So why shouldn’t we always forgive them when they err against us?

As humble parents, we will admit that our children constantly do things that annoy us. Blame it on the effect of hormones or peer pressure or whatever reasons that may be adduced, our children may not always be at their best behaviours towards us. That’s the reality of the life we live in as the earthly custodians of those precious souls.

A humble parent forgives his/her children all their wrongs because he/she too needs forgiveness from the Father above.

So when our children fall below our expectations (they will definitely do), should we continue to hold it against them? I think we should forgive them!

Should we ostracize them when their behaviours embarrass us? I think we shouldn’t!

First and foremost, we owe forgiveness to our children for whatever offences they have committed or will ever commit against us. Forgiveness is good for our overall mental and emotional well-being. Besides, God Himself does not expect any less from us.

Secondly, we should never cut-off from our children because they broke our hearts. Whether we like it or not, we are bound to them forever by our blood relationship. So as parent’s we cannot should not disown our children when they err.

Just like the loving father forgave the biblical prodigal son, we should always forgive our erring children. No matter how grave the offences might be, let us find it in our hearts to forgive them. It is part of our calling as parents.

How do you think parents should handle their erring children?

The Problems With Atheists (Finally Figured Out)

Atheists are people who believe that God does not exist.

In the course of running this blog, I have encountered some of them and have had various interactions with them. From some of my interactions with them, I could see that even though they all claim God does not exist, many of them still have problem with God.

They sometimes question His love, His justice and His character and are obviouly angry at Him. One of them even called God ‘a baby-killer’.

To that I asked him, “I thought you claimed God didn’t exist? How could He be a baby-killer if He didn’t exist?”.

The question is, if atheists truly believe that God does not exist, why does it bother them so much when we say He does? Why do they express so much angst towards God and any mention of Him or His attributes?

I have contemplated that question for a while and I came to the conclusion that in their heart of hearts, atheists know that God exists but they just don’t want to acknowledge Him. They may deny that they ‘know’, but I will not be surprised about that.

I see no reason they should continue to engage in diatribes against God. I mean, what is the essence of trying to prove that a ‘non-existent’ God does not exist? They obviously have a problem they haven’t probably figured out!

As believers, atheists scorn us for believing that God exists. But they turn blind eyes to their own folly in not believing that He exists.

Also, they don’t fully realise their own limitation in not knowing all things yet are boldly proclaiming that God does not exist. Doesn’t that validate the biblical position that only fools say God does not exist?

The only way to know without an iota of doubt that God does not exist is to possess the capability of being ‘all-knowing’. As you know, no man alive or dead, including atheists themselves possess that kind of knowledge.

So I would totally agree with one Hank Hanegraaff when he said, “atheism involves a logical fallacy known as a universal negative. Simply stated, a person would have to be omniscient and omnipresent to be able to say “there is no God” from his own pool of knowledge.

“Only someone capable of being in all places at the same time — with a perfect knowledge of all that is in the universe — can make such a statement based on the facts. In other words, a person would have to be God to say there is no God. Hence, the assertion [that God does not exist] is logically indefensible.”

Simply put, atheists do not have what it takes to come to the conclusion that God does not exist. So when you have anyone claiming God does not exist, understand that he or she is either being insincere or are displaying their ignorance. Or as the Bible puts it, they are simply being foolish.

Just like the Sadducees that accosted Jesus over a question on resurrection, whereas they didn’t believe in resurrection, the problem with atheists who go about discrediting God and the notion of His existence is that they neither know the Scriptures nor the power of God.

By not knowing the Scriptures here, I do not mean to say that atheists have never read the Bible, because I know many of them have. The problem is that those of them who have read it lack the proper understanding of it.

***

Let the conversation continue in the comment section.

“How Do I Keep My New Year Resolution Of No More Premarital Sex?”

That was the question someone asked on an open online social network forum I belong to. The question was asked about four years ago, but it still feels so fresh like today’s stuff. That’s why I’m revisiting it here.

Premarital sex has to do with people engaging in sexual activities before they are legally married. In other words, sex before marriage!

“What’s wrong with sex before marriage?” you may ask.

Well, let me ask you back, “What’s wrong with opening a clinic and performing complicated surgeries before obtaining the medical licence to do so?”

You may say the analogies are not the same. But that’s your perspective.

My perspective (which is Biblical too) is that sex is to be practised within the holy confines of marriage. Anything outside of that is devil’s idea.

You may disagree with me over that but it will show two things: you don’t know God and you are not accountable to Him.

If you truly know God and you see yourself as accountable to Him, you will know of a fact that there is everything wrong with premarital sex.

Forget about the unwanted pregnancies or abortions that may result from it, the diseases one may contract through it, the broken trust and disappointments that may result from it, the guilt and the shame….Think of it as disobedience to God or as Joseph put it, a “great wickedness and sin against God” (See Genesis 39:9).

Did you see that? Premarital sex is sin against God. Nothing short of that.

“Everyone is doing it.” But that doesn’t make it right!

Perhaps the person that asked the question that formed the title of this post had come to that realisation that sex before marriage is not good; or may be she has not, I can’t tell for sure.

But one thing was sure: the person was looking for answers. And I felt compelled to put out my suggestions on that online forum.

Those contributions of mine form the bulk of the text that I’m sharing below.

First and foremost, we would agree that it is good to make new year resolutions on matters that are of interest to us – like that lady tried to do with stopping sexual activities before marriage.

Whether the resolutions are kept or not is another kettle of fish all together.

But what that poor lady failed to realise was that to be able to stop engaging in premarital coitus, it will take more than a simple resolution at the beginning of the year; it would require a more compelling reason.

Like I said to her, “Ordinary resolution is not enough. If the reason is not strong enough, you can’t keep the promise.”

I don’t know about you, but what reason(s) would I consider strong enough for the lady to stop all sexual activities before marriage?

1. That she is now born again, so old things have passed away, including engaging in premarital sex;

2. She is now convinced that premarital sex is a sin against God, so she is stopping the practice because she doesn’t want to continue in sin and continue to displease God;

3. That she is now trusting in God to help her keep the promise of abstinence till she gets married, not relying on her strength or willpower alone;

4. That she is now ready to obey God by staying away from sex until she is married, even at the risk of loosing her current man if he refuses to respect her decision to abstain.

If she is not sure of any of the above, I doubt if she can keep the promise of her new year resolution of discontinuing that practice of engaging in sex before marriage.

What do you think?


The Mistakes Of The Sadducees

You have probably heard about the over-zealous group of people in the Bible known as the Sadducees. But if you are not sure who they are, the Gospel of Matthew has it that they are a group of religious leaders who did not believe in resurrection from the dead.

That same day Jesus was approached by some Sadducees—religious leaders who say there is no resurrection from the dead – Matthew 22:3, NIV.

These same arrogant people came to Jesus and began to ask him an impossible question about marriage after resurrection. Relying on the provisions of the laws of Moses on the responsibility of a man to his deceased childless brother, they contrived a theoretical case of seven brothers who had died childless and who had in turn been married to the same woman.

Let us read the encounter with the Sadducees together:

Matthew 22, NIV: 23…They posed this question: 24 “Teacher, Moses said, ‘If a man dies without children, his brother should marry the widow and have a child who will carry on the brother’s name.’ 25 Well, suppose there were seven brothers. The oldest one married and then died without children, so his brother married the widow. 26 But the second brother also died, and the third brother married her. This continued with all seven of them. 27 Last of all, the woman also died. 28 So tell us, whose wife will she be in the resurrection? For all seven were married to her.”

Wait a minute, I thought the Sadducees didn’t believe in resurrection from the dead? How come they were asking Jesus about “who will marry who” in the resurrection?

Obviously, they must have had an ulterior motive just like their counterpart, the Pharisees, who wanted to “trap Jesus into saying something for which he could be arrested” by asking Him the question of whether or not tax should be paid to the government authority of the day (see Matthew 22:15-22).

Gratefully, Jesus caught them in the act and He gave them the profound answers that inspired this post.

29 Jesus replied, “Your mistake is that you don’t know the Scriptures, and you don’t know the power of God30 For when the dead rise, they will neither marry nor be given in marriage. In this respect they will be like the angels in heaven (emphasis mine).

How I love the wisdom of Jesus in tackling knotty situations!

There you have it. According to Jesus, the mistakes of the Sadducees are in two folds: Not knowing the Scriptures and not knowing the power of God.

What do you think?

Two Antidotes To Divorce Hidden Away In Malachi

God instituted marriage for our enjoyment and His will for us is to have it as a life-long union. That’s why we say, “till death do us part” at the point of entering the marriage contract.

You will agree with me that because we live in an imperfect world does not make divorce the perfect solution to marital crisis.

Is divorce in marriage inevitable? No! Is it avoidable? Yes!

Can we know what to do to avoid divorce? Yes! Gratefully we have some clues in the Bible.

In the book of Malachi, we have some suggestions. (Malachi is the last book of the Old Testament Bible). If you are like me, the book may not be your favourite part of the Scriptures.

However, in it are some great treasures worth digging up for our earthly use. For instance in chapter two, we read the following words (NKJV):

1But did He not make them one,
Having a remnant of the Spirit?
And why one?
He seeks godly offspring.
Therefore take heed to your spirit,
And let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth.

1“For the Lord God of Israel says
That He hates divorce,
For it covers one’s garment with violence,”
Says the Lord of hosts.
“Therefore take heed to your spirit,
That you do not deal treacherously.”

In excavating the gems in these two verses, we had already talked about the assertion by the prophet that God hates divorce and also followed up with the reasons God hates divorce. Let us go further by looking at the recommended antidote to divorce in that passage.

In case you missed it, just reread the last two lines of verse 15 and 16:

Therefore take heed to your spirit,
And let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth.

“Therefore take heed to your spirit,
That you do not deal treacherously.”

There you have them stated clearly and repeated for emphasis sake.

I like the way the New Living Translation puts those words:

So guard your heart; remain loyal to the wife of your youth. “For I hate divorce!” says the LORD, the God of Israel. “To divorce your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty, ” says the LORD of Heaven’s Armies. “So guard your heart; do not be unfaithful to your wife” (Emphasis mine).

No need to over-flog it. The antidotes to divorce according to Malachi are:

  1. Guarding your heart against it
  2. Being faithful to your spouse.

Whatever does he mean? In subsequent posts, we will explore those points further . For now, let the conversation continue in the comment section.

Thank you.

Why Does God Hate Divorce?

… Without a doubt, divorce was the worst season of my life. Nothing I’ve suffered since that time even comes close… absolutely nothing compares to the horrific pain of having a spouse decide, “I Don’t” after saying “I Do” Laura Petherbridge.

divorce

In a previous post, we talked about the fact that God hates divorce. The natural question that would be precipitated by that statement will be:

Why does God hate divorce?

First and foremost, we all know that hate is a strong language, meaning “an intense dislike for.”

On the other hand, Divorce connotes  “the legal dissolution of a marriage by a court or other competent body.”

God says He hates divorce, meaning He has an intense dislike for it.

There must be some good reasons God does not like divorce. And those reasons are what this post seeks to explore.

If you ask me, I would say God hates divorce chiefly because He loves us and wants the best for us. He doesn’t want us to go through the pains, regrets and difficulties divorce action might occasion.

God loves us enough to inform us that He hates for us to subject our spouses to divorce. We all know that if you truly love someone, you wouldn’t want something bad to happen to him or her. Don’t you think God feels that much sympathetic towards us?

I guess you too have your reasons you think God says He hates divorce. (And I would like it if you would drop your views in the comment section of this post). For now let’s focus on what we can glean from the foundation scripture for this post and the previous one.

Malachi 2:15-16 – Let’s read it together:

15 Didn’t the Lord make you one with your wife? In body and spirit you are his.[b] And what does he want? Godly children from your union. So guard your heart; remain loyal to the wife of your youth. 16 “For I hate divorce!”[c] says the Lord, the God of Israel. “To divorce your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty,[d]” says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies. “So guard your heart; do not be unfaithful to your wife” (NLT).

Based on this passage, let’s now explore further reasons God hates divorce:

1. God instituted marriage.

“Didn’t the Lord make you one with your wife?” asked Prophet Malachi.

God has made you one with the person you are married to. So why do you seek to be separated from him or her forever?

God instituted marriage for our enjoyment and His will for us is to have it as a life-long union. That’s why we say, “till death do us part” at the point of entering the marriage contract.

It is safe to say that divorce undermines the sanctity of this holy institution of marriage established by God. Therefore God hates divorce.

divorce-separation-marriage-breakup-split-39483

2. God has a purpose for instituting marriage.

God did not only institute marriage, He had a purpose for doing so. The prophet here tells us that God seeks godly children (one translation uses the word “offsprings”) from our marriages.

“… And what does he want? Godly children from your union… Remain loyal to the wife of your youth.”

In order words, God expects our marital unions to bear godly seeds, godly fruits or godly results. You will agree with me that divorce will not qualify as a godly fruit.

Secondly, God also wants married couples to demonstrate loyalty to each other through thick and thin. And divorce flatly defeats that purpose.

3. Divorce has consequences

“To divorce your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty,[d]” says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies.

Wow, did you see that point in that verse you just read? Divorce is cruelty to your spouse. Another translation describes it as treachery.

Many people may disagree with that, but I know God’s word cannot be wrong. God would rather not have you go through the pains associated with divorce.

He hates it for you to bring divorce upon yourself or upon your spouse. He would rather have you shut the door on divorce…

Whatever you think, divorce will cost you – be it emotionally, financially or otherwise. Apart from the couple involved, other associated parties (including your children and other loved ones) also suffer when marriage fails and results in divorce. Divorce will cause you pains, anguish, depression and the like.

As Laura Petherbridge observed from her own experience, “…divorce was the worst season of my life. Nothing I’ve suffered since that time even comes close… absolutely nothing compares to the horrific pain of having a spouse decide, “I Don’t” after saying “I Do.””

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What’s your own view about why God hates divorce?


©Copyright 2019 | Victor Uyanwanne

Another Atheist Who Found God

“Being an atheist must be like living in a closed cell with no windows” – Anthony Hopkins.

If you are a movie enthusiast, I am sure you have heard about the name, Anthony Hopkins. But if you haven’t, a simple check on Wikipedia will convince you that he is not a man of mean achievements in the movie industry.

Let’s take a little peep:

“Sir Philip Anthony Hopkins CBE is a Welsh actor, director, and producer. He won the Academy Award for Best Actor in 1992, and was nominated three additional times. Hopkins has also won three BAFTAs, two Emmys, and the Cecil B. DeMille Award. In 1993, he was knighted by Queen Elizabeth II for services to the arts.”

Anthony Hopkins
Anthony Hopkins. Photo Credit: CBN News

According to a report monitored via Godupdates, “Anthony Hopkins is one of the most well-known actors of our time. For years, he was a well-known atheist, too. But all of that changed when a woman at an AA meeting challenged his disbelief with one simple question… “Why don’t you trust God?“”

It was the expression, “For years, he was a well-known atheist” that first caught my attention. But I’m glad to learn that all that has changed.

You must now use the word “former” atheist when referring to Hopkins, because he has become a firm believer in the existence of God.

Not only that, he now “lives out his real life with Christ in his heart. He’s been an atheist before finding God and now he just feels sorry for atheists, comparing a life of disbelief to “living in a closed cell with no windows.”

Sir Hopkins’s transformation and conversion from atheism to Christianity began with his positive response to that question, “Why don’t you trust God?” at a time he was dealing with alcoholism.

A reputable source has it that,”miraculously Anthony says the craving to drink was taken from him, “never to return again.” And he’s believed in God ever since, working day after day, year after year, to grow in his faith.”

In the end, he not only got helped with overcoming the spirit of alcoholism which had bedeviled him, he transformed from being a man who didn’t believe that God exists to one that now affirms that He does.

“When asked in a CNN interview with Piers Morgan if he believed in God, former-atheist Anthony Hopkins replied wholeheartedly, “Yes, I do. I do.”

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What do you think?

“I Hate Divorce” – God

“I hate divorce.”

As you may have noticed, those are not my words. They are God’s, as recorded in the Bible.You will read it directly yourself shortly.

When you hate something, you have intense dislike for that thing. I guess that’s how God feels over some of the things we humans do.

For instance, the writer of the book of Proverbs tells us about seven things God hates (6:16-19):

  1. Haughty eyes (a proud look).
  2. A lying tongue.
  3. Hands that shed innocent blood.
  4. A heart that devises wicked schemes.
  5. Feet that are quick to rush into evil.
  6. A false witness who pours out lies.
  7. And a person who stirs up conflict in the community.

If God hates the above things, it means He has intense dislike for them and He is not pleased whenever we engage in any of them. But that doesn’t mean He would stop loving us.

God’s love for us is without end; We can be sure that even if we are not perfect, He still loves us anyways.

One more thing God hates

There is one more thing we are told that God hates: divorce. And that is the focus of this post.

Divorce, “the legal dissolution of a marriage by a court or other competent body,” – God says He hates it. In Malachi 2:16(NLT), we read the following words:

For I hate divorce!” says the LORD, the God of Israel. “To divorce your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty, ” says the LORD of Heaven’s Armies. “So guard your heart; do not be unfaithful to your wife.”

In the preceding verse (15), we were given some hints on why God hates divorce. The prophet Malachi communicated that to us in rhetoric:

“Didn’t the LORD make you one with your wife? In body and spirit you are his. And what does he want? Godly children from your union. So guard your heart; remain loyal to the wife of your youth.”

If you read verses 15 and 16 together, the picture comes out even better. Although the emphasis is on men who divorce their wives, the warning would equally be applied to wives who divorce their husbands.

For I hate divorce!” says the LORD, the God of Israel. “To divorce your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty, ” says the LORD of Heaven’s Armies. “So guard your heart; do not be unfaithful to your wife.”

In the days when Malachi wrote those words, the men were more likely to put away their wives than wives would their husbands. But in our day, it can go either ways.

In any case, the message is clear: God hates divorce.

Having said that, I am also aware that divorce is common place in the world we live in today. But that doesn’t make it right, neither does it stop God from hating it.

If you are contemplating divorce, you may want to reconsider. Before you think of divorce, think about your children.

No marriage is irredeemable, provided you are giving your best to make your marriage work.

And if your marriage is already broken and you are reading this, note that I do not mean to condemn you in any way. If I did, I would be playing God, which I’m not.

We are just talking about God’s perfect purpose for marriage: to be united as one till the end of their lives, because he hates divorce.

That is to say, God intended for a married couple (a male and a female) to be committed to each other in a lifelong loving relationship, reflecting God’s eternal love and commitment to us His people.

Is that an impossible task to achieve? I don’t think so!

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You have read my thoughts. Share yours in the comment section.


©Copyright 2019 | Victor Uyanwanne

Why Share Your Testimonies?

Has God ever done anything great for you? If nothing (which I doubt), what about the testimony of your salvation?

That’s assuming that you have given the lordship of your life over to Jesus Christ. And even if you have not, it doesn’t mean God never been good to you.

The truth is that if you think well enough, you will find something in your life that you are immensely grateful for, that you should be thanking God for and also be sharing with people around you.

It is a good thing to stand before people and testify of the goodness of God in your life. David once declared, “I will praise you to all my brothers; I will stand up before the congregation and testify of the wonderful things you have done” (Psalm 22:22, TLB)

So why don’t you want to share your testimonies?

Is it fear or shame or pride that is hindering you  from talkingt about the Lord’s goodness in your life? Aren’t you grateful God came through for you when you needed His help?

Whatever is it, let nothing stop you from sharing your testimonies of what God has done for you.

Sharing your your testimonies will bring the following benefits:

sharing your testimonies

1. Sharing your testimonies brings glory to God

The purpose of your testimony is to draw attention to God, not to put you on a pedestal of some sort. It is to exalt the name of the Lord before your audience.

Provided that you do not lie or exaggerate your testimonies, you bring glory to God whenever you share or testify of what God has done for you.

When you hoard your testimonies (and that’s what you do when you refuse to share them with people), you deny God the opportunity to be glorified or exalted before the people around you.

Don’t hold back any more; Share your testimonies with people, because doing so brings immense glory to God and shame to the devil.

2. Sharing your testimonies strengthen your faith in God

It is a thing of joy for you to openly talk about what God has done for you. Apart from the emotional relief or satisfaction it brings to you, it also empowers your faith in God.

It gives you that feeling that the God who delivered you now will do so for you again next time.

In the dialogue between King Saul and the shepherd boy David before the latter when to fight Goliath, David testified,

“The LORD who rescued me from the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear will rescue me from the hand of this Philistine.” Saul said to David, “Go, and the LORD be with you” (2 Samuel 17:37).

It was this testimony that inspired David to confront and completely defeat the war veteran known as Goliath

Testimonies are part of your spiritual weapons. Remember the following words in Revelation, “And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony…” (12:11).

3. Sharing your testimonies encourages other people to trust God more

Apart from strengthening your own faith in God, sharing your testimonies can also encourage your hearers.

Let’s say you were in a pit and God delivered you from it. Right now many people are in the same pit you once were. Sharing the testimony of how God delivered you will inspire hope in them and strengthen their faith in God for possible deliverance as well.

Your testimony has the potential of revealing God to people or pointing to them to God. So it is a great disservice to people around you if you fail to share your God-given testimonies with them.

4. Sharing your testimonies slaps the devil big time

If sharing your God-given testimonies brings glory to God, it automatically has the opposite effect on the devil. It shames him and beats him up big time.

Understand this: if your pride stops you from sharing the testimonies of what God has done for you, you are in effect giving the devil opportunity to smile. I will assume that’s not what you want to keep doing.

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It is a good thing to share with people the testimony of what God has done for you. When you do so, you bring glory to God, you strengthen your faith in God, you encourage other people to trust in God more and you bring shame to the devil.

Do you find it easy or feel ashamed to share your testimonies? Leave us a comment or two.


©Copyright 2019 | Victor Uyanwanne